True Heir of Slytherin
by Rinoti
Summary: What happens when prophecy about great savior becoming great destructor, falls into wrong hands? Why simple, great destructor becomes even greater! Naruto in Hogwarts! Strong!Naruto almost God-like!  Huge Harem! though nothing serious. Dark!Naruto!
1. Heir revealed!

"Naruto" - speech

_'Naruto'_ – thoughts

"**Naruto" - **demon/black zetsu

"**Naruto"** - Jutsu.

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><p><em><strong>True heir of Slytherin<strong>_

********** Chapter 1 - Heir revealed! =**

**= Konohagakure no Sato, October 10th =**

Konohagakure no Sato or just Konoha, is beautiful village, that inhabits thousands of people, shinobi and civilian alike. Konoha is known to be peaceful village, but at the same time it is also famous for it's strength, will, and is also known as the strongest of five major villages. Konoha earned that kind of fame by producing many strong shinobis, and winning last two 'Shinobi Wars'. Since the second shinobi war ended, Konoha has seen mostly peaceful days. But alas, today is far from peaceful in Konoha...

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><p><strong>= Not far from the walls of Konoha =<strong>

**ROAAAAAAAR**

"**Shiki Fujin! **Have a little faith in him! He is our son after all, Kushina-chan."

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><p>As forth Hokage finished hand-seal sequence, he was unaware that not far from the barrier, that was holding the Kyuubi, stood his enemy, who was observing everything that was going on, with his sharingan, spinning wildly, taking in every detail.<p>

But when said enemy saw what was about to happen, something in his mind suddenly clicked, and his one visible eye widened, as if in recognition

_'So _that_ is what prophecy was about! I _ must _have this child, but first, I should double-check it.' _thought masked stranger, and disappeared with a swirl.

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><p>And just as barrier, that was holding the Kyuubi, fell, Hiruzen Sarutobi rushed to the spot where two dead bodies and an infant were lying. Former Hokage could clearly hear cries of newborn, and it broke his heart to watch the scene before him. <em>'Just several hours into new world, and already had to witness his two most precious people die.'<em>

But before he could even get near to blond baby, masked man appeared out of nowhere, took blue eyed infant, and disappeared just as fast as he came, not even leaving a trace that he was there.

It took about a minute for third Hokage to recover from shock, and when he did recover, he fell on his knees, helplessly wondering if he would ever get the chance to see blond boy again.

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><p><strong>= Many miles away from Konoha =<strong>

Same masked man appeared with a baby in his arms, in a dark room, with only source of light being few candles. Said baby was still crying his little eyes out, but not moving much.

Before masked individual could do anything at all, something popped out from the floor. Masked man merely titled his head to the side, to see what it was. He was greeted with very interesting sigh, or maybe it would be interesting for somebody who haven't seen it before, but for this man, this was just a daily routine.

From the floor emerged a man, or some kind of mixture of a man and a plant. His upper body and head was enveloped by two large venus fly-trap like extensions, and it was in fact open, showing the man inside. He has short green hair, yellow eyes, and his body had two different colored halves. His left side was completely white, while his right side was black with small white dots along his body.

"Tobi, why did you bring this child here?" asked the while half.

Masked man, now identified as Tobi, just turned his head back to newborn, and after a long pause answered.

"Zetsu, do you remember that prophecy, which I found not so long ago?"

There was a slight, but finally, black half of the man-plant creature known as Zetsu, answered. "**I remember it perfectly well, word to word.**"

"I believe that the one, who prophecy was talking about, is currently in my arms. And I was just about to check it."

Now this got Zetsu's attention. He moved closer to Tobi, to have a good look at a blond haired child.

Masked sharingan user then put his arm on infant's head, and looked straight in his eyes. For several seconds nothing happened, the only difference was that blue eyed child stopped crying, and was now curiously watching spinning sharingan eye. But after another minute, he squirmed in man's arms, as if in pain, and started crying even louder, closing his eyes in the process, letting tears flow freely down his round face. And when he opened his eyes again, Tobi and Zetsu gasped at the same time.

Where before there were two blue orbs, now were black orbs with red, six-edged star in the middle of them, spinning as fast as Tobi's sharingan. And moments later, his eyes changed to full matured sharingan, and then back to his original blue orbs. Mere seconds after that, child was fast asleep, leaving two men with nothing but silence.

"H-How is that possible that this child has Mangekyou sharingan? What did you do to him?" asked shocked white half of Zetsu, while his black half just stared at the child with awe, shock and fear.

"I did not do anything to this child, though I suspect that it were my actions that caused him gain mangekyou. As to how he has sharingan in the first place – it is quite simple."

"How so?"

"You see, Yondaime Hokage had Senju and Uchiha blood flowing in his veins, that he wasn't even aware of."

"**But if he was part Uchiha, surely he would awaken sharingan sooner or later."**

"Actually he couldn't. As you know, I always make a background check on my enemies, and while digging information about Namikaze Minato, I discovered a few interesting facts."

"Oh?"

"Yes, you see, there was once a woman in Uchiha clan, who had an affair with a man from Senju clan. But that man died on a mission, leaving Uchiha woman pregnant. That woman, for whatever reason, decided to keep the child, but after some time became scared that her clansmen would find about her having a child from Senju. She then somehow got hold of very old seal, that was known only by Uchiha clan head or elders. That particular seal was designed to seal off individual's sharingan, forever. It was mainly used on traitors. So after giving birth to a child, she immediately sealed off his sharingan, and left him in an orphanage, with different name. And that child grew up to be the Yondaime Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato. But there was one more little detail, that only few Uchiha had known of. That woman was descendant of Madara Uchiha."

"**I see, but that still does not explain why he has mangekyou."**

"My guess is that it was caused by the sealing, and from seeing both of his parents die. After all, feeling of loss and hopelessness is known by all, even as young as him."

"**What will you do with him?"**

"I will keep him, and raise him as the true Uchiha, after all, if what prophecy said is true, than this child has potential to surpass Rikudō Sennin." said Tobi, his one visible eye shining with excitement and anticipation.

"How will you name him, hmm?"

"He already has a name. It was given to him by his biological parents. His name is Naruto...Uchiha Naruto."

"**Never thought of you as an honorable person."**

"I am not, I'm just too lazy to think of the new one." said Masked man, with a slight chuckle.

"**I certainly look forward to see how this will turn out."** said the black half, while the white half let out a humorous laugh.

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><p><strong>= 6 years later – Unknown location =<strong>

Blond child, roughly 6 years old, was training in a clearing that had many craters, and chunks of earth were laying around, that were made by the said child, from the looks of it.

"Naruto-kun!" called Zetsu as he appeared from the ground, behind the six year old.

Naruto, hearing his name being called, turned around, and gave a small wave as greeting. "What is it Zetsu?"

"**Your father wants to see you, so hurry up, and finish your training.**" said Black Zetsu, disappearing back into the ground.

_'Dad wants to see me? I wonder why...Could he actually remember? Sigh, only one way to find out I guess.'_ though blue eyed boy while cleaning himself from all the dirt that was on him.

He then quickly walked toward the building, and toward the room where his father was waiting for him.

As he walked inside, he could see Tobi sitting behind the desk, waiting for him, with little box in his hands.

"Dad, Zetsu told me that you wanted to see me."

"Indeed, Naruto-kun. Do you know what day is today?" asked masked man, his sharingan eye shining with some sort of excitement.

"October 10th, why?" asked blond Uchiha, watching his father with curious expression._ 'Is it what I think it is?'_

"Yes, and today is also your birthday. And I got your present right here." he said patting the box that he was holding.

As soon as those words left his mouth, Naruto's eyes widened, looking at Tobi in shock.

"What? Did you really think that I would forget about my only son's birthday?" asked elder sharingan wielder, showing his amusement.

"I-It's just I never thought that you'd be one for birthdays and such." Naruto managed stutter out.

"Believe it or not, I really do care about you a great deal. And I actually gave you something special every time on your birthday before. I'm sorry if it looked like I didn't."

"N-No, don't say that. It should be me who must apologize for not noticing it sooner. You probably think that I'm ungrateful, selfish and spoiled and - "

"Stop it! You are none of those things! You are merely too young, and therefore you could easily have missed it, considering you training regime and all. I am immensely proud of you, and as you know, it is very hard to earn my respect."

Hearing his beloved father say those thing to him, made him shine with happiness, and he felt like nothing could stop him.

"Thank you so much, Dad. I promise you, I won't ever disappoint you, I will be the greatest shinobi in the world!" declared Naruto, as his eyes shone with determination, likes of which Tobi have never seen before.

Tobi smiled proudly behind his mask. _'Never thought that I would get so attached to him, in such little time. And to think that he would go such a length just to make me proud of him...it really makes me happy that i'm his father. Heh...if somebody told me 10 years ago that I would have a son, and I would love him like a real parent should, and that he would love me back even more, I would probably laugh at them...and then kill them...oh well, can't say that I'm not happy with how thing turned out to be'_

"I believe in you, Naruto-kun. Now let's stop with sentiments, I'm not as young you, and there is just so much sentimental stuff that my poor heart can withstand in such a short amount of time." said masked man, letting out a small chuckle.

Hearing his father say this, sent Naruto in fits of uncontrollable giggles.

"Now let's wait for Zetsu. I believe, he also has present for you. I will give you mine last" This statement obviously filled blond child with excitement.

And indeed, several minutes later, Zetsu emerged from the floor, carrying 3 large scrolls, and medium sized one.

"Whoa! Is that all for me?" asked Naruto, with look of pure awe.

Seeing his look made even Black Zetsu laugh, but after several seconds, he was able to get it under control.

"**Yes, all four scrolls are for you."**

"What are they about?"

"Let's see..." said White Zetsu, as he put all four scrolls in front of him. All four of them were different, and looked pretty fancy, with only medium one being plain white color. "...the one with swirle on it, has everything that I could recover from Uzumaki clan, and believe me, it was not easy finding anything decent in the ruins. Brown one has everything from Senju library, that I recovered from Senju mansions across the elemental."

"T-T-This is just AMAZING! This is - "

"Don't mention it, you would get them eventually anyway, but what you _can_ thank me for are the last two scrolls, those are special gift from me."

Naruto just looked at him questionably, waiting for him to continue.

"You see, while I was in Konoha, I decided to grab the scroll with all the kinjutsu that was ever recorded in Konoha, in it. And the smaller one has two signature techniques of your...uhm...biological father."

Hearing Zetsu mention one of his _biological parents_ made him stiffen. He knew that he wasn't blood related to Tobi, if only slightly. He was told all about his _real_ _parents_ about a year ago, when he asked his Dad about it.

* * *

><p><em><strong>= Flashback =<strong>_

"_Dad, I wanted to ask you something." said blond child, as he looked up from his book, toward his father who was sitting behind his desk, as usual._

"_Hmmm? What is it?" asked Tobi, looking up from whatever he was doing._

"_I read in many books, and seen other kids with their parents, but I only have a father. And I was wondering what happened to my mother. Did she die? Did she left me...us? Or was it something else? Please, Dad, tell me."_

_Masked individual silently stared at his adoptive son for several minutes, and then let out a heavy sigh._

"_I was hoping that we wouldn't have this discussion for several more years, not because I wanted to keep it from you, I was just afraid that you would not understand it fully. But you turned out to be exceptionally smart, and I believe that you are ready to hear it all about it." _

_He then motioned Naruto to come closer, and to get comfortable._

"_You see, son, I am not your biological father, I adopted you after your biological parents died."  
>Shock was evident on little blond's face as he looked at his father. But Tobi paid him no mind, and instead continued.<em>

"_Now let me tell you a story of how you came to be my son." _

_And tell him, he did. He told him everything that has transpired that night, without leaving any little detail. And when he was done, he asked one simple question, which caused Naruto's mind to work in overdrive. "So what do you think about it, son?"_

'Indeed, what _do_ I think about it?' _Blue eyed Uchiha was silent for about 10 minutes, thinking over everything that he was told about. Finally he decided to voice his thoughts. "I am confused." was his only answer, though completely truthful._

"_What are confused about?"_

"_About the actions of the Yondaime Hokage."_

"_Oh?"_

"_Yes, why did he not teleport his wife to the hospital instead? From what you told me, she would have survived the extraction of the Kyuubi, with some medical attention. And there even may have been the chance of her surviving without any medicine at all. Also, if his main focus was on saving the village, then he had much more available option to use instead of that sealing, which killed him in the process. Can you explain that me, father?"_

_Tobi smirked widely behind his mask. "See, that's why I said that you were ready to hear all about it. Most children of your age would accuse me of killing their real parents, or even outright hate me. Of course those children would be too naïve to understand everything, but not you, no, you are very smart, and you see everything for what it really is." _

_Hearing his father praise him, made Naruto immensely proud of himself, but he maintained neutral __expression, or at least he tried to._

"_Now let me help you out with figuring it all out. You see, as you said, Hokage's main priority was saving the village, and doing everything in it's best interests. And as I said, Jinch__ū__riki are weapons for the villages who have them, and Yondaime knew that without Jinch__ū__riki, Konoha would be seen as weak, and would be attacked by other villages. So he decided to create a weapon. There is one simple answer to all your question – Namikaze Minato, Yondaime Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato, was ready to sacrifice lives of his wife and son, for his village, meaning – he valued village over his own family."_

"_B-But what about my mother? Why didn't she stop him? Or did she have the same ideals as the Yondaime?"_

"_No, but sadly, her love for Yondaime, blinded her too much to see what he doing."_

"_I see..."he looked down sadly, but suddenly looked up."But wait, why did you took me with you, and what reason did you have to do so?"_

"_I will tell you...in time, when I deem you ready to hear it. But know this – I never regretted it, and it was definitely for your best. If I left you in Konoha, they would most likely turn you into their weapon, or treat you like trash, and then demand that you protect them."_

_For several minutes there was just silence._

"_I will wait patiently for you to tell me, I know that if you say that I am not ready, that means that I am indeed not. And for what it's worth...thank you for being a good father to me." said Naruto with a warm smile, which he only showed to his father._

_Again, everything was silent for couple of minutes, but this time it was broken by the masked man. He stood up, made his way over to Naruto, and did something unexpected, he pulled him in warm embrace. _

"_It should be me, thanking you for being such a good son." he whispered quietly._

_**= Flashback – end =**_

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><p>Naruto looked up from the scrolls to his father, and stared at him for several second, as if having some sort of silent conversation. Finally after about 3 minutes of their silent argument, his father spoke.<p>

"Take it Naruto, take it, learn everything, and improve them, make them better, show us that you are much more greater than the Yondaime, it's the least you could do to show Zetsu, how much you appreciate his gift."

Naruto turned back to Zetsu.

"Thank you Zetsu, for your time and effort, I really appreciate it." said blond Uchiha, bowing to man-plant mixture, that stood in front of him.

"You are very welcome Naruto-kun, your father and I expect great things from you in the future."

Naruto merely smirked at this, as if completely sure that he will do just that.

"Now Naruto-kun, put those scrolls away, and come here, it's time for me to give you my gift." said adoptive father of blue eyed Uchiha.

Six year old's eyes lit up immediately after hearing this, barely containing his glee. He quickly made his way over to his father's desk, almost jumping with excitement.

Finally his father opened little, wooden box that he held in his hands. There, inside the box, on a silky material, lay a tube, filled with some sort of liquid. But what grabbed Naruto's attention was what floated inside the tube. There were pair of eyes. But by no definition were they any ordinary eyes, oh no, they were eyes of Uchiha Madara.

Naruto gasped in recognition. He couldn't not recognize those eyes. After all of the stories that his father told him, after all the pictures that he showed him, it was practically impossible not to recognize those eyes, that held so much power.

"Dad, why are you giving them to me? Wouldn't it be better if you wielded them instead?"

Masked man just chuckled.

"I am a bit ashamed to admit it, but those eyes rejected me."

"What do you mean 'rejected me'?"

"Exactly what I said. You see, before his death, Madara applied some sort of seal on his eyes, so only the person worthy of those eyes would be able to use them. I was afraid of damaging those eyes, and thus did not dare to do anything to those seals. And when I tried to wield them, they did not acknowledge me as worthy of them." admitted Tobi.

"What happened?" asked intrigued Naruto.

"First I heard some hissing in my head, and after several minutes, I felt pain like no other. The only thing I heard before passing out, were this words: You are not worthy of legacy of Madara Uchiha."

"And you believe that I will be able to wield those eyes?"

"I do not believe so, I know so!"

Knowing that his father had such a faith in him, made his fears disappear in an instant.

"I accept your gift, father. When can we start the implanting operation?" asked, now overly-excited Naruto.

"Whenever you wish." was his only answer.

"Then let's do it now!" proclaimed blond Uchiha.

Tobi smirked behind his mask, at his sons enthusiasm. "If you wish so, then so be it. Zetsu, prepare operation room."

Plant-like man just smirked, and gave a nod. "At once, Tobi."

* * *

><p><strong>= 45 minutes later – operation room = <strong>

Transplantation operation was finished merely 5 minutes ago, and Naruto now lay on the operation table, waiting for _anything_. Already 5 minutes have passed, but nothing happened, he was starting to get impatient, along with Zetsu and Tobi, who were by his side. But then he heart it, soft voice in his head.

"_If you really are worthhhhy of my power, then repeat after me: I accccccccept the legacccccy of Uchiha Madara."_

Naruto opened his mouth, and repeated everything word for word, but what surprised him, was that instead of his usual voice, he heard himself actually hissing those words.

But before he could ponder anymore on that strange hissing he made, he heard the soft voice talk to him again.

"_Hello stranger, my name is Uchiha Madara, and if hear this, you are descendant of great Salazar Slytherin, and my new heir, that will carry my legacy. And if haven't guessed yet, this is merely a recording. But enough about this. The real reason I made this recording, is because I sealed all of my memories in my eyes. Prepare yourself, you will now view my whole life for 7 days straight. And one last thing before this recording stops – Use my eyes and skills well, be it for evil or good."_

"I will be fine" Naruto managed to say, before he lost consciousness, not to be awaken for next seven days.

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><p><strong>WOOHOO! First chapter is DONE!<strong>

**So tell me how I did. Tell me if you like it, hate it, or simply don't give a fuck.**

**Aaaaaaaaaaand...that's it. **

**See ya next time, boys and girls!**

**P.S: Link to picture with Naruto's Mangekyou Sharingan in my profile! Check it out! I wasted whole 5 minutes making it!**


	2. New, wide world!

"Effff" - speech

_'your'_ – thoughts/parseltongue

"**couch"** - demon/black zetsu/summon/ or w/e

_**'upside'**_ – demon/summon/black zetsu thoughts

"**down"** - jutsu/spells

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><p><em>Previously in the 'True Heir of Slytherin' :<em>

"_Prepare yourself, you will now view my whole life for 7 days straight. And one last thing before this recording stops – Use my eyes and skills well, be it for evil or good."_

"_I will be fine" Naruto managed to say, before he lost consciousness, not to be awaken for next seven days._

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><p><strong>Chapter 2 – New, wide world!<strong>

**= Somewhere in the Land of Fire – One week after Naruto received his new eyes =**

"Ugh...son of a bitch! I don't care what it takes, I _will_ revive that bastard, then fry him like a chicken, then revive him again, and cut him to pieces. Argh! I hate this freaking headache!" were the first words of one Uchiha Naruto, who was now tearing bandages off his eyes, after seven days of slumber.

"Naruto-kun! You're awake! What happe...ne...d?"

Looking to his right, Naruto could see his father, who just entered the room, staring at him, with curious expression. Not that you could really see his face, but blue eyed child, after years of observing his father, could easily recognize it.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?" said six year old kid, with raised eyebrow.

Instead of answering, Tobi gave him a mirror, which he pulled out of...somewhere, and pointed at it.

When he looked in the mirror, he could see himself in it, and he instantly understood what his father was so curious about. Now, instead of his spiky, blond hair, and round face, with slightly visible whisker marks, he had silky, semi-straight black hair, with some some spikes at the back, and leaner face, with darker whiskers.

He then activated his sharingan, and pumped even more chakra into his eyes, to see new and improved version of them. When his eyes changed one more time, he could now see same six pronged star, but now it also had three black circles in it, connected to the center by three black line._**(link in the profile)**_ He looked at his eyes for several more second, before looking up from mirror.

"Ah...so that what it is about. I almost forgot about it."

"Care to explain?"

"Yeah, sure. Oh, and Zetsu, please show yourself, would you? Listening on us, without actually being seen by us, makes you kind of a stalker, ya know?"

Next second, Zetsu popped out from the wall, to Naruto's left, with not-so-amused expression.

"Right, so let me start with some little background story first." started, now-raven-haired kid.

Noticing that both, his father and Zetsu were listening with interest, he continued.

"You see, not many people knew it, but Madara was very good with seals. Not as good as Uzumaki seal master, mind you, but he was pretty decent. And as you know, he didn't have a heir, or at the very least decent one, seeing as he only had a daughter, who wasn't much of a warrior. But after his daughter was born, he lost the ability to produce children, in an unfortunate accident. And so, he decided that if he couldn't have a heir, he would make one by some other means. After all, he didn't want his years of hard work to go to waste, but he didn't want to leave his legacy to the Uchiha clan, seeing as they 'betrayed' him. When he learned that his time was near, he sealed all his memories in his very eyes, knowing that somebody would try to use them sooner or later. And this is how I know so much about him. I remember his every moment, every thought, every words he said, and every action he took."

"But wait, wouldn't that essentially make you...him?" asked Tobi

"Oh, but Madara was smart, he foresaw this. And that is exactly why it only took me seven days. You see, everything was sped up to 2000 times. It was as if I read a book, or watched a movie about his life, very fast. It was too fast for his personality to replace mine, though some of it slipped on to me a bit. But the main part is that only important memories were left, like his knowledge on certain things, or skills that will help me, other useless stuff was thrown away by me, even though I could remember it, if I really REALLY tried. And to be truthful, I kinda did it unconsciously, so I will have to work on my mind, so I would be able doing that on my own will." finished young Uchiha.

"That's amazing and all, but what about your change of appearance?" asked masked sharingan wielder.

"Oops, I guess I got little excited, and got carried away." answered Naruto, looking somewhat sheepish.

"Really? I couldn't tell by your expression, like I usually do."

"Ah well, I guess it is trait that I got from Madara. You know, Uchiha's emotionless expression and all that, which I guess, I was also doing unconsciously. Damn, one more thing to work one."

"**So...your appearance?" **asked Black Zetsu, entering the conversation.

"Well, it goes like this, and I quote 'If you will be heir of the greatest Uchiha, you might as well look like one.' So now Madara is basically my second father, sort of."

"I see, that's very interesting." said Tobi, looking thoughtful.

"Hey dad, you know that you are my only father, right? You're not mad or something?" asked now a little bit nervous Naruto.

Masked Uchiha, for his part, just smiled behind his mask, and said "No, son, i'm not mad. And I know how you think, don't worry"

"You know how I think? But how?"

"I'm your father, it's my duty to know this things."

"So what are you going to do now?" asked White Zetsu, but did not specify who.

"Well, i'm gonna increase my training regime, and work even harder than before, and learn everything I can." answered ex-blond.

"And i'm just going to continue doing what I was doing before Naruto woke up." answered Tobi.

"**By the way, why were you cursing when you woke up?"**

"Well, Madara could've made experience less painful, but he was too lazy to add another seal, and also I quote 'Pain is a good teacher'...tsk, that lazy asshole."

Both Tobi and Zetsu laughed at this, while Naruto just scowled, while muttering something like "It was really painful"

* * *

><p><strong>= Three years later - <strong>**Mountains' Graveyard**

It was once again October 10th, and Naruto was excited, though he didn't show it. Only his father could see clear excitement in his son's eyes, as young Uchiha stepped inside his office, or at least that what he called it. It was actually almost empty room, inside the dungeons, with a desk and several cases, behind which he sat himself.

"Hello son, and happy birthday to you. This year, I have a very special gift for you, maybe almost as special as the eyes you wield right now."

Only indication that Naruto was surprised, was slight widening of his eyes, but next second his face was once again unreadable.

Tobi, let his hand slide down and into the hidden case in his desk, from which he pulled out...a book, a very old book at that.

"What's that?" asked confused, blue eyed Uchiha.

"This is something very important. This is a personal journal of Rikudō Sennin, but I suspect that you already know his real name from Madara's memories, which is...Salazar Slytherin." said masked Uchiha, handing old journal to his son, who accepted it, with slightly shaking hands.

Now Naruto was _really_ excited, and he openly showed it by quickly opening said journal, which had _Salazar Slytherin_ engraved on it's cover, and reading it, forgeting to thank his father for his generous gift. But his father didn't mind, he just watched with amusement as his son read the journal.

"Naruto-kun, remember my promise to tell you the truth behind your adoption?" this sentence managed to pull Naruto, out of his trance, making him jerk his head in his father's direction.

"It seems that time has come, for me to tell you about everything. You are ready to hear it."

Naruto just nodded.

"You see, the reason I took you with me that night, is because of the prophecy."

Nine year old Uchiha's expression changed to the curious one. Tobi paid him no mind, instead choosing to continue.

"And before you ask where I learned about particular prophecy, I read it in that journal you hold. The only thing that I written in our language, is prophecy. Everything else is written in foreign language that I don't recognize."

"But how can it be? I can clearly read _everything_ that is written here." interrupted Naruto.

Masked Uchiha sighed in relief.

"That's good, I was hoping that you would be able to read it. After you told me about Madara's message, where he called you descendant of Slytherin, I was almost sure that you would be able to read it. Now do you want me to tell you the prophecy, or would rather read about it yourself?"

For minute, Naruto was deep in thoughts.

"I want to hear it from you, I can read it later." said blue eyed Uchiha.

"Very well, here is the prophecy: _**Heir of one who was split in three, shall be combined into one. Sacrificed to protect, will be raised to destroy. Great savior or great destructor, one of two will child **__**become. Heir's fate will be decided by Elder Monkey or Swirling Schemer.**_"

"And you think this 'Heir' is me?" asked senior Uchiha.

"Yes, you fit perfectly."

Seeing his son's puzzled expression, he decided to elaborate.

"Let me explain, Naruto-kun. 'Heir of one who was split in three, shall be combined into one', prophecy is reffering to Rikudō Sennin. Uzumaki, Uchiha and Senju were descendants of Rikudō Sennin, and you have blood of those three clans flowing through you. 'Born to protect, will be raised to destroy', you protected whole village by becoming Jinchūriki to Kyūbi no Yōko, but you would be shinobi in any case, and shinobi are killers, we destroy lives. 'Heir's fate will be decided by Elder Monkey or Swirling Schemer' You see, Sarutobi Hiruzen, Third Hokage, would be the one to decide your fate, would you have stayed in Konoha. And as you guessed, Sarutobi is the Monkey, and I'm the Schemer. So do you believe me now?"

"Well...i can't argue with that logic. Can I have some time to think about it?"

Tobi gave him affirmative nod.

* * *

><p><strong>= Next day =<strong>

Elder Uchiha made his way toward his son's room, and knocked.

"May I enter, Naruto-kun?"

"Of course dad, come in." was his only response.

When he entered the room, he could see ex-blond sitting on his bed, meditating, while old journal was next to him, on the bed.

"I came to check on you. You usually do not take such a long time to think something over."

"It is not that, I do not really care about that prophecy. I just got too engrossed with this journal, you wouldn't believe what I found out. And it is no wonder that you could not read it. Salazar...charmed it, so only those who can speak to snake would be able to read it."

"Charmed?" asked Tobi carefully.

"Yes, charmed. It is amazing."

"What is?"

"Everything!"

"Explain..."

"When I read this journal yesterday, I couldn't believe my eyes. Salazar wrote about himself, about his whole life. How he was born far away, on an island called England. How he discovered that he was a wizard, yes, a wizard, isn't that amazing? How he and three more people created a school for witches and wizards. How he then traveled around the world, learning all kinds of magic and such. How he found himself on an island called Japan, where people hardly heard of magic. How he faced a beast called Jūbi, on the same island. How he couldn't defeat it, and sealed him in himself instead. How he sealed off part of that island, and named it Elemntal Nations. How sealing of that beast in himself created something known as chakra, and gave him amazing abilities. It's all so unbelievable! I didn't even sleep, I was thinking about it, whole night."

By the time Naruto stopped talking, Tobi's eyes were wide in shock and amazement. He knew that his son would not joke about this stuff.

"And it is not all! He created a portal, so only people with eyes, body and blood like his own would be able to use it. That portal would lead you past the barrier that hides our existence from the rest of the world."

They say in silence for several minutes, both lost in thoughts, until younger occupant of the room decided to speak up.

"Father, I have something to ask you."

"I'm listening."

"I want to leave, to learn magic."

"Did you think this over?"

Naruto just gave a curt nod in return.

"But I do not wish to leave just yet. You see, that magic school I told you about, accepts students starting from the age of 11. And one year will be more than enough to adapt to everything new."

"So you want to leave in one year?"

"Yes."

Tobi sighed, and stayed silent for a minute, before looking at his son, with some sort of gleam in his visible eye.

"Say Naruto-kun, fancy going to war?"

Young Uchiha eyed his father carefully.

"War you say? When, where and against who?"

"Ah you see, I planned to do this a bit later, but seeing as you want leave in a year, you will need as much experience as you can get. And what better experience than fighting in a war. As to your questions - soon, in Kiri, against bloodline rebellions."

As soon as those words reached Naruto's ears, sadistic/predatory smile formed on his face.

"You didn't even need to ask! Hahaha, it will be so much FUN!" were the words of excited Uchiha, as he let out almost maniacal laughter.

This action caused his father to remember how he developed his sadistic nature.

* * *

><p><em><strong>= Flashback = <strong>_

_Tobi stepper into the clearing where he dropped off his son couple of hours ago. He knew that little Naruto-kun needed real battle experience. And what batter experience than fighting against 2 squads of Kumo ANBU._

_What he saw amazed him. His son, child no older than seven, sat on several corpses of shinobi, covered in blood from his head to his little feet, smiling with glee._

"_Naruto-kun?" asked masked Uchiha slowly._

_Raven haired child looked at his father, still smiling._

"_Dad, they were so tough, I had to fight just to survive. If not for my Sharingan and Rinnegan, I would be long dead. But you know dad, it was just so...so...FUN! It was the most fun I had in my life. I had to use everything I have to stay alive. Can you we do it again, please?"_

"_Of course, son. We can do it again, whenever you want"_

_**= Flashback end =**_

* * *

><p>From that day, Naruto's favorite pass time was bounty hunting. He wouldn't miss a chance to test his skills against stronger opponent.<p>

"Well, then off you go to training. After all, you have a war to fight in very soon."

Naruto hopped off his bed, and dashed toward to door, but stopped when he heard his father.

"Oh and son, I wasn't planning on giving you my special gift for several more years, but considering that you will be leaving very soon, and it probably will be a long time 'till I see, I might reconsider. And of course, only if you prove that you are worthy of it, in an upcoming war." said elder Sharingan wielder, pointing at his eye.

Young Uchiha's eyes widened in shock, as he understood what his father was implying.

* * *

><p><em><strong>= Flashback – Several hours after gaining new eyes =<strong>_

"_Dad, there's something I need to tell you." _

"_What is it?"_

"_You see, Madara found a way to take a unique ability that other sharingan wielder possessed, for himself. You could do that if you had Eternal Mangeky__ō__ Sharingan. And in theory, you could take, up to three different abilities. Madara had two ways of doing it. First, you could implant an eye which possessed particular ability, use that power, and then implant your original eyes back. Second method would take much longer, but it would be less painful. You would need to draw two seals, you would need to be in one of them, and place the person who has the desirable ability in another, and stay in them for 24 hours. And seals must be drawn with both of participant's blood."_

"_That's...an interesting piece of information. Thank you, Naruto-kun."_

_**= Flashback end =**_

* * *

><p>Naruto's grin got even wider as he ran out of his room to train.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>One year later – Somewhere in Kaze no Kuni =<strong>

Somewhere in the dessert of Kaze no Kuni, two swirls started ripping the space. From those swirles appeared 3 people.

Those people were Zetsu, Tobi and Naruto.

Naruto didn't change in past year, if only grew couple of inches tall. Actually he looked more like 13 year old teen rather than 10 year old pre-teen.

He now wore black, high collar shit with Uchiha crest on his back, long black pants with many pockets on them, and black shinobi sandals. His hair were now a bit longer too, reaching his shoulders, and he also had long bang covering his right eye, and reaching his cheek.

"You know dad, I can never thank you enough for your latest gift, this thing is just too damn useful."

Tobi's response was a loud laugh.

"You thanked me enough already. And remember what I told you, I only gave you the tools to become great , your job is to _use_ them, _and _become great!"

Naruto grinned at the elder Sharingan wielder. "I will never forget that."

With that said, he pulled out all too familiar journal and opened it. After going thought several one-handed hand-seals, he put his palm on said journal. His palm glowed with chakra, and after several seconds, long, white snake popped out of journal, and began making it's way somewhere into the dessert.

"Quick, we must follow that snake, it will take us to the portal." said Naruto, and started chasing after the snake, with Zetsu and Tobi running behind him.

After about 20 minutes of running through the dessert, they finally stopped after spotting white snake curled around little, square rock.

"Hmmm...let's try it. _Open."_ hissed Naruto, but after waiting couple of seconds, nothing happened.

He was about to try again, when sand around them started to vibrate, and suddenly a wall, that resembled a closed gate, emerged from under his feet.

"Well, I guess this is it huh?" asked young Uchiha, as he turned around to meet his father's gaze.

"I will miss you Naruto-kun, and if you need something, you know what to do." said masked man, and patted his right pocket, which had a bulge resembling a scroll.

"Yeah, I sure do." responded blue eyed pre-teen, letting out a small chuckle.

"Well then, I see you later. And don't forget, I will visit every year for couple of months." said Naruto, stepping through the portal.

* * *

><p><strong>= Other side of the portal =<strong>

When Naruto stepped out of portal, he could tell that it was cold, and after few minutes of looking around, he knew that he was on a very high point, on a big mountain to be precise.

He could see light of the city that was far ahead.

"Heh, ready or not, here I come!" said smirking, raven haired Uchiha, as he jumped high in the air, and his eyes momentarily changed to the Rinnegan. Next second, he was flying toward the city, like a rocket, flames coming out from under his feet.

_'Haha,gotta love Asura path'_ was his thought as he flew on a very high speed.

* * *

><p><strong>So here it is, second chapter of my new story! Tell me what you think, I really wanna know!<strong>

**So if anybody's interested as to why I started this story, it's rather simple – when I tried to look for some good Naruto/HP x-over, all I found was the stories with almost same scenario in every one of them! It's either "Harry goes to Konoha, and becomes a ninja" or "ANBU Naruto goes to Hogwarts." I'm not saying that it's bad or anything, but come on, it gets fucking boring after a while. And seeing as I didn't find any FF's with something like i'm attempting to do, I thought to myself "Eh, fuck it, if there isn't such a FF already, why not make one?"**

**So anyway, I hope you enjoyed it! And i'll see you all next time!**


	3. Exploration and adaptation!

"Boom " - speech

_'chika'_ – thoughts/parseltongue

"**bow"** - demon/black zetsu/summon/ or w/e

_**'wow'**_ – demon/summon/black zetsu thoughts

"**rawr"** - jutsu/spells

* * *

><p><em><span>Last time on THOS:<span>_

"_Heh, ready or not, here I come!" said smirking, raven haired Uchiha, as he jumped high in the air, and his eyes momentarily changed to the Rinnegan. Next second, he was flying toward the city, like a rocket, flames coming out from under his feet._

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

**Exploration and adaptation!**

Naruto landed in a dark alleyway, and hid himself in a shadow of the night.

_'Hmmm...this Tokyo seems pretty big, and from what i've seen, it seems like it's pretty crowded here. Also it looks like this worlds technologies far surpass ours, but they are unable to access chakra. Though from what I could sense, there is fair number people with high level of **Yin** energy, which indicates that they are wizards But first thing first, I need more information about this world, before I attempt to do anything.'_

He waited patiently for somebody to pass by the alleyway that he was hiding in.

He didn't have to wait long.

Middle aged man was calmly walking toward the place where Naruto was hiding himself in, not paying much attention to anything.

From his scan, young Uchiha could tell that this man was just a civilian, and it was exactly what he needed.

Blue eyed jinchūriki quickly sprang forward from the shadow, and grabbed unfortunate man by his head. Poor man could only stare at his attacker in shock, before Naruto forcibly dragged man's soul out his body, and absorbed into himself, gaining all of his victim's memories.

Before soulless body could hit the ground, Naruto caught it, and dragged it into the shadow, along with himself.

After he successfully hid the body, he closed his, and settled down into the meditating position to analyze new memories that he gained.

After he was finished with his current task, which took no more than 5 minutes, he opened his eyes, stood up, and **Henge'd** into the man he just killed.

_'Interesting, how very interesting indeed. Such an intriguing world that holds unlimited knowledge and resources. And what is even more interesting, is that normal civilians are not aware of wizarding world, even though wizards walk among them. But i'm quite lucky that this man didn't have any family of his own, nobody will search for him. And now that I think about it, I better burn the body.'_

With a quick **Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu**, body was gone, leaving only ashes.

He proceeded to exit the alleyway, making his way into the town, with a huge smirk plastered on his face.

_'Well, let's not waste anymore time, after all, we have _so much_ to explore!' _

* * *

><p><strong>= 2 months later – October 23<strong>**rd – 1990 =**

In past two months, Naruto learned a lot this new world, he found himself in.

To say he was amazed, would be an understatement. He though about how very similar his and this world seemed to be, but at the same time so very different.

Now he was sitting on the tip of the Tokyo Tower, gazing at the night sky, as the lights of many lanterns, buildings, cars were shining beneath him.

_'Now the question is – which way should I choose to travel? I could take a plane to America, and then one more plane to UK, or I could take a boat to Russia, travel through it and Europe, reaching UK. Hmmmm...what should I do?'_

_'Eh, better take a plane to America. I don't have time to travel, and plus, I would have much more opportunities in America. Well, it's decided then!'_

"Oh well, it's been fun hanging around the Tokyo, but I need to get moving. I bet it won't be pleasant sitting in the damn plane for 12 hours. Sigh, I guess I will just have to endure it."

With his next destination decided, he stood up and stretched. He then looked down, and smirked.

"Oh how I love this feeling." said Naruto, and jumped from the tallest structure in Tokyo, his face splitting in a huge grin, as he soared toward to ground. And just as he was about to hit the ground, he disappeared, not even leaving a trace of him being there.

* * *

><p><strong>= Several weeks later – U.S. – N.Y. =<strong>

Naruto was standing in a crowded street, somewhere in New York, preparing to start the execution of his plan. Said plan formed in Uchiha's head, around a week ago, while watching a movie.

* * *

><p><em><strong>= Flashback =<strong>_

_'_I don't like this_' were the thoughts of one Uchiha Naruto as he sat inside of a shack, that he found while jumping from roof to roof around NY._

'Tch, I could survive in worse conditions, but it does _not_ mean that I have to like this. It gets so annoying sitting here, with all this old and broken stuff around. Dammit, I need money, and I need a lot of it.'

_And so he started thinking of the best way to get a lot of money in short period of time, and fast!_

_Unexpectedly, his answer came from a movie that he was watching at the time. Previously mentioned movie was about criminals trying to rob a bank._

'That's it! I just need to rob a bank! But wait...why stop with just _one_ bank?' _a wide grin appeared on his face, as he started thinking of a plan to clean several banks empty._

_**= Flashback – end=**_

* * *

><p>From that point it was quite easy. He decided to hit ten largest banks in U.S.A. First thing he did, was to create three <strong>Mokuton Bunshin<strong>, and send each one to different state.

After that, he proceeded to collect as much information about targeted banks as he could, which was quite a lot.

And now, as he was standing in front of one of the banks he decided to rob, **Henge**'d as middle aged woman, he was preparing for the final part of his plan.

Though unlike those fake bandits in a movie, Naruto wasn't planning to barge in, with guns and masks, screaming bloody murder. Oh no, far from it.

He would take every last cent, and not soul would notice it.

But he knew that if he did what he intended to do, he would fuck up this country's economy quite a bit.

_'Eh, who gives a shit? I certainly don't.' _

And with that thought in mind, he started crossing a street, heading toward the bank, still in his disguise.

He entered large building, and walked to the security guy.

"Hello, I am very sorry Sir, but could I please use this banks restroom?"

Tall, muscular man merely stared at her, but after several seconds answered. "Sorry ma'am, but only our staff has access to it."

Naruto's eyes changed to sharingan, and started spinning.

"But Sir, I really _really_ need it right _now_."

There was no reply from security guy for a minute, but then, as if in trance, he turned around, and gestured for Naruto to follow.

As soon as they reached the restroom, Uchiha looked in man's eyes, sharingan still spinning, and ordered.

"Now, you will go back to your post, and forget about me"

Without replying, bulky man walked back, not giving anybody second glance.

Seeing as first part of the final stage was complete, Naruto activated his Rinnegan. And as soon as he did, three more pictures popped in his mind, which were from the clone's point of view. As soon as he confirmed that his clones successfully infiltrated every bank that was assigned to them, he deactivated Rinnegan, and switched back to Sharingan.

He released his **Henge**, revealing his smaller frame, dressed in black, spandex bodysuit.

_'Time to test how my new seal works' _ thought raven haired Uchiha, as he sent chakra into his bodysuit, and activated two seals that were drawn on his spandex suit's chest and head area.

As soon seals activated, Naruto disappeared completely, though his shadow, that was created from a bright lamp in the restroom, remained.

_'Let's see if it worked'_

He turned around, and looked in the mirror, only to see nothing but thin air.

_'HA! It worked! Still, I will have to do something about this shadow, it could blow my cover.' _thought ex-blond as he excited the restroom, and stealthily made his way toward the vault, that was located at the lowest level of this bank, avoiding several armed men.

_'Hmmm...i still haven't named my new seals. Aha! First one will be **Camouflage seal** and second ** See-through seal.** Yep, that will do...Wait! Why the hell am I even thinking about this shit while robbing a bank? Sigh, I have pretty fucked up mind.' _

And with that disturbing thought in mind, young Uchiha reached a big door of the vault.

_'I definitely need to thank dad for his last gift, that he gave me'_ though Naruto, and phased through the door that led to the vault.

Once he was solid again, he found himself in the room full of cash, gold and little cases on every wall.

_'Infiltration – success!Now for the last stage of my plan' _was shinobi's thought, as wide grin spread on his face.

He put his hand on his hip, and channeled some chakra into it, which revealed storage seal. There was a little cloud of smoke, and second later, Naruto had little, white scroll in his hand.

He opened scroll that he held, and put it on the floor. _'Good thing that I created more than one __**Two-way storage scroll**__. _

He then proceeded to make about ten **Shadow Clones**, and ordered them to empty all vaults, as he himself started doing just that.

As soon as he opened one of the cases, he put all that was inside, on top of the opened scroll, and channeled some chakra into it, causing all cash, gold and jewelery to disappear with cloud of smoke.

* * *

><p><strong>= Meanwhile -Safe-house =<strong>

Naruto's clone was sitting in the middle of the room, with huge, open scroll behind him, and ten little, open scroll in front of him.

He was currently staring intently at the small scrolls, without averting his gaze.

As soon as one of the scroll's color changed from white to bright red, clone pressed it's hand on top of it, causing goods from the bank to appear.

He quickly grabbed everything, and sealed it into the huge scroll, that was behind him.

* * *

><p><strong>= Back with the Original Naruto =<strong>

Raven haired boy activated Rinnegan to check if everything was in order.

When he made sure that things were working out as they were suppose to, he deactivated his dōjutsu, and continued to collect everything that was inside a huge vault.

* * *

><p><strong>= 10 minutes later =<strong>

_'Seems like this is all there was. And now is time to get the hell outta here.'_ thought Naruto, and one more time turned on his dōjutsu, checking if his other clones were done as well.

When he confirmed that everything had gone as planned, he summoned little piece of paper and brush.

_'Summon me back to safe-house'_ he wrote with black ink, and put it into **Two-way storage scroll.**

He waited couple of seconds, before he disappeared in a cloud of smoke, leaving vault almost completely empty.

Several hours later, when guards would enter a vault, they find nothing but a little piece of paper, on which would be written just two sentences.

_**'Thank you for letting me use your restroom.**_

_**P.S: You guys have a really nice soaps.'**_

* * *

><p><strong><span>= December 10<span>th – N.Y – 1990 =**

Naruto walked down a dark alley, looking straight ahead, not even paying any attention to the thugs that were looking at him like a piece of meat.

Couple more steps later, he stopped, and turned to his right, and walking toward black, metal door.

He stood still for a second, before knocking on a large door.

For several minutes there was no answer, only silence.

But then door opened, revealing a man around his 50's, looking at the child in front of him intently. He was dressed n simple white shirt, and black pants. His hair white and short, while his eyes were black and wide.

"What do you want kid? I don't have any candy for you, if that's what you want." said old man, with a rough voice.

Naruto merely chuckled and looked up into man's eyes.

"Sorry to disappoint, but I didn't come here for any kind of candy. Though I did come here to ask you for something."

"And what would that be?" asked white haired man suspiciously.

"You see old man, I came here to get the first love of my life." answered raven haired kid, letting out a small laugh.

"Huh? What'cha talking about, kid? I ain't got your girlfriend here or -" he was cut off by Uchiha's laugh.

"Who said that it was a person I was talking about?" said grinning Naruto.

"Then what is it?" asked frustrated, and at the same time, curious old man.

"You would know, you actually make them." was kid's answer.

Hearing this, man suddenly became quiet, and started looking at raven haired boy suspiciously.

"How do you know about this? I quit making them year ago, and I don't plan on starting again."

This only caused Naruto's grin to grow larger.

"I am sure that we will come to an...agreement, after all, money is no problem at all. And what I want, will get you lot of it."

Young Uchiha put his hand in his pocket, withdrew a sheet of paper, and handed it to the man in front of him.

"I want three pair of those by the end of this month. I am sure you can handle this job, after all, I heard that you are the best at what you do."

"Kid...are you...are you really serious about this?" asked man hesitantly.

"Absolutely!" answered Naruto brightly.

Old man was silent for a moment, before wicked grin appeared on his face.

"Then what are we standing here for? Come on in, and let's talk about details." he turned around, and walked back inside, gesturing for Naruto to follow.

* * *

><p><strong>= 20 Days later =<strong>

Naruto had ear to ear grin as he looked at the open case, that was on the table in front of him.

There, inside the black case, lay three pair of guns, or more specifically handguns.

Three of them were pitch black, and other half was silver with light brown handle.

"So what do you think?" asked old, gun maker.

"I love it! Did you do everything as I ordered?"

"Of course, as you said, I am best at what I do." was his quick reply.

Old man smirked as Naruto picked up one pair of guns, with one hand each, and started examining them.

"39cm in length, weights 16kg, fires 13mm rounds, magazine consists of 12 plus 1 bullet, and of course special, explosive bullets from the metal you gave me. Black gun in your right hand is semi-automatic one, with greater power in it, and white one in your left hand is fully automatic, with greater speed." said white haired man.

"Excellent!" said Naruto in almost maniacal manner, and put his guns back inside the case.

_'Of course I will have to add couple of seals that I designed specially for these babies. But I can think about it later.' _he mentally added.

"You did a very good job. And I am really thankful." he pulled up his own brown case, and put it on the table, next to black one.

"But you can't put a 'thank you' in your pocket, so here's your money for the job." said Uchiha, and opened his case, revealing many packs of cash.

Just as the man moved to collect his pay, his head was smashed into the floor, courtesy of Naruto's right hand.

"Fool, you should never trust a shinobi." said raven haired ninja, removing old man's soul from his body, and quickly absorbing it into himself.

_'Gotta thank dad later, for sending me **Chakra Metal.** These bullets will be so much better then the regular one. Just the mere thought of my bullet, induced with wind or fire chakra, flying at my enemy, gives me the urge to just run outside, and start killing people to test that idea, and of course just for the fuck of it! HAHAHAHA!'_

And with that insane thought in mind, he made his way toward the exit, with two cases, one swung over his shoulder, and other by his side.

* * *

><p><strong>= 2 minutes later =<strong>

Naruto was walking down the street, without care in the world, whistling a happy tune.

_**BOOOM!**_

When suddenly sound of an explosion ripped the air.

But raven haired Uchiha didn't even pause for a second. He just kept walking, with his happy demeanor still in it's place. That would be what stranger would see upon laying his eyes on the child. But if somebody was to look in his head, they would see maniacally laughing kid with gleeful expression.

_'Ahh, gotta love the C4. It probably sucks to be there now. But oh well, no use thinking about it, after all, I still have so much to do – get my ass to U.K., buy a big ass house, get badass car, make some legit looking documents for myself, send a letter to Hogwarts, and so much more. I better get my ass in a gear.'_

As his process of thought ended, he suddenly stopped.

_'Goddamit! I'm thinking about asses too much. I need to have sex, or my mind will explode. Ugh...i'm fucking 11 year old, and i'm thinking about sex as if my life depends on it. My mind is seriously fucked up...fuck you brain, and fuck you too, body, it's all your damn fault. Sigh, I don't have time for this right now, but I will definitely have time for this in Hogwarts!' _Naruto let out a rather audible, perverted giggle, which caused people that were passing by, to take a step away from him, wondering what was up with this insane kid.

* * *

><p><strong>= July 2nd – London -1990 =<strong>

Last couple of months were pretty productive for Naruto, to say the least.

When he first arrived into London, he did exactly what he did last two times when he arrived into the new city – absorbed two souls, one from regular civilian, and another from a wizard.

And of course, after learning about British wizarding world, he immediately visited Diagon Alley.

His first stop at Diagon Alley was Gringotts. And after seeing everything it had to offer, he instantly took a liking to it.

But of course, like everything else he did, there was a reason behind coming to Gringotts. Or more specifically _two_ reasons.

His first reason for coming to thins particular bank, was claim rights on the vault that belonged to Salazar Slytherin.

Of course it took quite a bit of time to prove that he was indeed heir to Slytherin family, and even more time to get access to Salazar's personal vault, which was actually his main reason for coming to Gringotts.

He was pleasantly surprised to find a good sum of money, several books on different types of magic and potions waiting for him in, now his, vault.

He also requested a new vault of his own, where he would be able to keep part of his wealth, which was actually his second reason for going there.

Goblins happily complied, after hearing how much money he was going to store in his newly a acquired vault.

In the end, Naruto decided to put only half of his wealth, which was around 10 billion U.S dollars, and transfer that sum of money into the galleons.

In the end, coupled with money that was in Salazar's vault, he had 714 272 109 galleons in total.

All in all, raven haired youth left Gringotts very satisfied and happy.

His next stop was Ollivanders Wand Shop. Not that he needed a wand, he could do almost everything wandless, thanks to his chakra controlm and Senju genes, which provided him even greater control. Though he still needed a lot of focus to cast a spell wandlessly. He was sure that with some practice, it would be much easier.

But from what he gathered so far, wand was working as conductor and amplifier for user's magic.

And after some thoughts on his part, Naruto decided to get himself a wand. For one, it would help him learn magic faster, and two, it would help him keep a low profile.

Of course before even thinking about buying a wand, he learned as much as he could about the art of wand making.

He could still remember it like it was just yesterday.

* * *

><p><em><strong>= Flashback =<strong>_

_This shop, that he was currently looking at, was narrow and shabby. Peeling gold letters over the door read Ollivanders: Makers of Fine Wands since 382 B.C. A single wand lay on a faded purple cushion in the dusty window. _

_A tinkling bell rang somewhere in the depths of the shop as he stepped inside. It was a tiny place, empty except for a single, spindly chair._

"_Good afternoon" said a soft voice._

_Naruto looked toward the counter, to see an old man with wide, pale eyes, staring at him curiously._

"_Hello." said Uchiha in return, not surprised in a bit with appearance of an old man._

"_What can I help you with, young man?" asked Mr. Ollivander._

"_Uchiha, Naruto Uchiha. I need a wand. I am starting my first year in Hogwarts." answered Naruto, not taking his eyes from Ollivander's pale ones._

"_Well then, let's see what I can find for you. I have a lot wands here, you just need to -"_

"_You misunderstood. I do not wish to buy one of your wands. I want you to make one, from the materials that I will give you. It's a tradition in out family."_

_Old man had a look of interest on his face._

"_Forgive me, but I don't recall hearing about Uchiha family."_

"_That's okay, we recently moved here from Japan."_

"_I see. Is there something else that I should know?"_

"_There is in fact something. You see, materials for my wand are very...unique. And I am not sure that any other wandmaker would be able to do it." _

_Naruto reached into his jacket's inner pocket, and pulled out a black rod, and some light colored substance in a little, transparent bag. _'Good thing that dad has **Two-way storage scroll**, otherwise I wouldn't have gotten Hashirama's cells in time.'

"_I want you to use this" Uchiha pointed at a black rod "as a wood, and this" he held out little bag. "as wand's core. Can you do it?"_

_Mr. Ollivander carefully picked up black rod to examine it._

"_How very interesting, I have never seen anything like this. I can literally feel power surging through it." said old man in amazement._

"_I would be surprised if you did. This was created from several minerals that grow only in Japan."_

_Pale eyed man, looked at Naruto with serious expression._

"_One month. Your wand will be done in one month, Mr. Uchiha."_

_Said Uchiha smirked, and without a word, turned around, and exited a store. _

_But not before telling one last sentence to Mr. Ollivander. _

"_I will be back in one month for my wand then."_

_**= Flashback – end =**_

* * *

><p>And what a magnificent wand it was.<p>

Ollivander even priced it as the 'Greatest wand that I ever did', and Naruto full-heartedly agreed with him. After all, he very much doubted that anybody else had a wand made from chakra rod and Senju Hashirama's cells.

His new wand was pitch black, with equally black, leather handle, and 12 inches in length.

Of course after he got his wand, he quickly applied several seals onto it, to prevent it's destruction. And after he was done, he could proudly say that there was practically nothing that could destroy it, or at least by any normal means.

And once again, he mentally thanked Zetsu for giving him Uzumaki's scroll.

And speaking of seals, Naruto covered his house, which was quite large, in seals, that would prevent anybody from outside to sense any chakra, and by extension magic, coming from his house.

Thanks to that, he could freely practice spells on his own, and not getting in trouble for underage magic use.

But back to the present, Uchiha was waiting for a reply to his letter, that he sent to Albus Dumbledore, requesting entrance into the Hogwarts.

Naruto of course knew that old headmaster would not deny him entry, especially after he threw in the line 'Heir to most ancient and noble house of Slytherin'.

And speak of devil, brown own flew through his open window, and landed on his dinning table, in front of him, carrying the yellowish envelope, addressed in emerald green to Mr. N. Uchiha, The Kitchen, 15 Hay's Mews, London.

He picked up the envelope, shooed the owl that was sitting on his table, and pulled out the letter.

_HOGWARTS SCHOOL of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY _

_Headmaster: ALBUS DUMBLEDORE _

_(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards) _

_Dear Mr. Uchiha,_

_We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. _

_Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31. _

_Yours sincerely, _

_Minerva McGonagall, _

_Deputy Headmistress _

Naruto sighed._'Great, now I need to buy an owl.'_

There was one more piece of paper, which Naruto guessed was the list of thing that he needed to buy.

He unfolded it, and read:

_HOGWARTS SCHOOL o f WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY_

_UNIFORM_

_First-year students will require:_

_1. Three sets of plain work robes (black) _

_2. One plain pointed hat (black) for day wear _

_3. One pair of protective gloves (dragon hide or similar) _

_4. One winter cloak (black, silver fastenings) _

_Please note that all pupils' clothes should carry name tags _

_COURSE BOOKS _

_All students should have a copy of each of the following: _

_The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1) by Miranda Goshawk _

_A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot _

_Magical Theory by Adalbert Waffling _

_A Beginners' Guide to Transfiguration by Emeric Switch _

_One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi by Phyllida Spore _

_Magical Drafts and Potions by Arsenius Jigger _

_Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them by Newt Scamander _

_The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection by Quentin Trimble _

_OTHER EQUIPMENT _

_1 wand _

_1 cauldron (pewter, standard size 2) _

_1 set of glass or crystal phials _

_1 telescope set _

_1 brass scales _

_Students may also bring an owl OR a cat OR a toad _

_PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN BROOMSTICKS _

And just as he suspected, he needed to buy shitload of things.

* * *

><p><strong>= September 1st – Naruto's =<strong>

Naruto woke up early in the morning.

He was really excited. Not because he was going to learn magic or some other typical bullshit, oh no. His excitement was caused by the fact that soon he was going to see Salazar's own basilisk. Oh, he couldn't wait to see her.

He made himself a quick breakfast, and after finishing it, got dressed in black T-shirt, blue jeans and white sneakers.

He was pretty tall for his age, and coupled with his muscles, made him look like a boy in his mid teens.

Uchiha quickly locked every door in his house, and activated seals on the house. _'I pity those poor bastards who will try and rob my house'_

When he was outside, along with his trunk, raven haired Slytherin took a cab to King's Cross

* * *

><p><strong>= King's Cross – 10:30 =<strong>

When he finally arrived to King's Cross, he quickly made his way toward the platform Nine, only to discover that there was no such platform as Nine and three-quarters.

He quickly scanned his surrounding with Sharingan, and found out that there was a barrier between platform nine and ten.

Naruto was almost sure that this was it, but he needed to be completely sure before he did anything. After all, who knows what kind of shit he would get himself into if he stepped through wrong barrier. And of course the man, who's memories Naruto acquired, didn't know anything about Howarts. Apparently he was home schooled.

He looked around again, and saw skinny, short kid with black, unruly hair, wearing pair of glasses, looking around in panic, as if expecting somebody to attack him. But what got Naruto's attention was his high level of **Yin** chakra, and trunk he was carrying. Coming to conclusion that this kid was also a wizard, he decided to approach him.

"Yo" said Naruto from behind the kid, causing poor boy to jump a little. Uchiha merely rolled his eyes at boy's action.

"Name's Naruto Uchiha, so you're going to Hogwarts too?" asked blue eyed male, causing shorter boy's face to lit up as if christmas came.

"Yes, could you...um" he managed to mumbled.

"Tell you where entrance is?" asked Uchiha.

In reply, Naruto received only nod.

"Yeah...about that, I don't know either. I actually came to ask you." sighed Naruto.

He looked around again, for any sign of wizards, trying to sense any high level chakra. He picked up several signatures coming toward him, and when he looked in the direction of said signatures, he could see a family of red-heads.

"Look, kid, I'm not helping type of a guy, but if you wanna tag along for now, it's fine. You're gonna end up asking me anyway." said Naruto, starting to walk toward the red-heads.

"Okay." was short kid's only reply.

"By the way, you never told me your name."

"Oh, sorry about that, guess I forgot. My name is Harry Potter, nice to meet you, Naruto."

"Harry Potter huh? I think I heard this name somewhere before. But nevermind that now." also Naruto noticed Harry stiffing for a moment, when he said that he heard his name, he didn't comment on it.

"Excuse me" said Naruto, as he approached plump woman.

"Hello, dears. First time at Hogwarts? Ron's new, too." she said, and pointed at the last and youngest of her sons. He was tall, think, and gangling, with freckles, big hands, and feet, and a long nose.

Naruto glanced at him for a second, but quickly looked back at woman.

"Yes. I'm Naruto Uchiha," he smiled pleasantly at the woman, trying to look like innocent kid. "and he is" he gestured to Harry.

Harry taking a hint, introduced himself as well, causing whole family to gasp and look at him in wonder.

"You see, we are a bit lost here. Could you be so kind as to show us how to get onto the platform" said Naruto, flashing them his charming smile.

"Yes, of course, do not worry. Oh, and my name is Molly Weasley, this is Ginny, Fred and George, and this is percy." she pointed at the small girl, twins, and what looked like the oldest son respectebly.

"All you have to do is walk straight at the barrier between platforms nine and ten. Don't stop and don't be scared you'll crash into it, that's very important. Best to do it at a bit of a run if you;re nervous." said woman of the group.

"Thank you, Mrs. Weasley, you were very helpful." said Naruto, with his charming smile still in it's place. _'So I was right,huh?'_

He turned around, not waiting for reply, and walked straight through the barrier.

A scarlet steam engine was waiting next to a platform packed with people. A sign overhead said Hogwarts' Express, eleven o'clock.

Smoke from the engine drifted over the heads of the chattering crowd, while cats of every color wound here and there between their legs. Owls hooted to one another in a disgruntled sort of way over the babble and the scraping of heavy trunks.

The first few carriages were already packed with students, some hanging out of the window to talk to their families, some fighting over seats.

Naruto pushed his trunk through the crowd, in search of empty an empty seat.

He finally found an empty compartment near the end of the train. He lifted his trunk, put through train doors, and took a seat in near the window, trying to relax.

But two minutes later, door of his compartment opened, revealing Harry, dragging his trunk behind.

"Hey...um...do you mind if I..." started Harry

"sit here?" finished Naruto, getting a nod from Harry.

"Sure, make yourself at home, just don't make too much noise. I want this ride to be at least somewhat relaxing." after getting another nod from shorter male, he went back to relaxing in his seat.

But as Naruto's luck would have it, several more minutes later, door opened _again._

Blue eyed Uchiha, silently groaned at being disturbed.

He looked toward the door, and saw red head standing there, Ron, if remembered correctly.

"Anyone sitting there?" Ron pointed at the seat next to Harry. "Everywhere else is full."

"I will tell you same thing as I told Harry, you can stay if you keep quiet." answered Naruto.

Ron was about to say something, when twins popped out behind him.

"Hey, Ron. Listen, we're going down the middle of the train – Lee Jordan's got a tarantula down there."

"Right." mumbled Ron.

Twins looked inside the compartment.

"Hey Harry, and hey,...erm..."

"Uchiha, Naruto Uchiha."

"Wow...is that some kind of Chinese name?"

"It's Japanese actually, it means maelstrom."

"Woah, that sounds cool. So you are Japanese huh? How did you get in Hogwarts?"

"I never said that I actually _live_ in Japan. I was born in Japan, but moved to America several years later, and this year, me and my dad moved to London."

"We see." said twins together.

"Must've been fun. Well, see you later, then." said identical Weasleys, and slid the compartment door shut behind them.

"Are you really Harry Potter?" Ron blurted out, which caused Naruto to groan louder than before.

Harry nodded.

"And have you really got – you know..."

He pointed at Harry's forehead.

Harry pulled back his bangs to show the lightning scar. Ron stared.

And in that moment, Naruto's eyes flew open.

"That's it!" Uchiha almost yelled.

Harry and Ron looked at him strangely, but Naruto ignored them.

"I finally remembered where I heard your name." said raven haired shinobi, pointing at Harry.

"You're the guy that supposedly defeated some dark wizard, right? What was his name again?"

"Voldemort." answered Harry suddenly.

Ron gaped at Harry, looking at him as if he was some sort of alien.

"Oh yeah, Voldemort. It's a bit mouthful though. I guess that guy wasn't that good with names huh?"

Now Ron was gaping at both of them.

"What?" asked Naruto, already irritated at red head's staring.

"You both said You-Know-Who's name!"said Ron, sounding both shocked and impressed.

But before he could continue, he was cut off by Naruto.

"What's so special about his name anyway? You look almost afraid of it. Do people not say it or something?"

"A lot of people remember those times, and are still afraid of saying his name." answered Ron.

"What? People are afraid of _name_ of all things? Dude, that's bullshit." said Naruto.

There was a moment of awkward silence, well awkward for Harry and Ron. As for Naruto, he pretty much enjoyed several moments of silence.

It was actually Harry who broke the silence by asking a question.

"Are all your family wizards?"

"Er – Yes, I think so."said Ron. "I think Mom's got a second cousin who's an accountant, but we never talk about him."

"My only family is my father, and he _is_ a wizard, so I guess my answer would be yes." said Naruto.

"So you both must know loads of magic already."

"I know some..." replied Uchiha.

"I heard you went to live with Muggles," said Ron to Harry "What are they like?"

"Horrible - well, not all of them. My aunt and uncle and cousin are, though. Wish I'd had three wizard brothers." was Harry answer

"Five," said Ron. For some reason, he was looking gloomy. "I'm the sixth in our family to go to Hogwarts. You could say I've got a lot to live up to. Bill and Charlie have already left - Bill was head boy and Charlie was captain of Quidditch. Now Percy's a prefect. Fred and George mess around a lot, but they still get really good marks and everyone thinks they're really funny. Everyone expects me to do as well as the others, but if I do, it's no big deal, because they did it first. You never get anything new, either, with five brothers. I've got Bill's old robes, Charlie's old wand, and Percy's old rat."

Ron reached inside his jacket and pulled out a fat gray rat, which was asleep.

"His name's Scabbers and he's useless, he hardly ever wakes up." Naruto snorted hearing this. "Percy got an owl from my dad for being made a prefect, but they couldn't aff - I mean, I got Scabbers instead."

Ron's ears went pink. He seemed to think he'd said too much, because he went back to staring out of the window.

_'Ah, so he's from the poor family huh? I better not tell him that i'm loaded, or he will be even more annoying'_

After that, Naruto zoned out, trying to take a little nap.

When Naruto woke up from his little nap, it was already half past twelve.

He heard some clattering outside in the corridor, and a smiling, dimpled woman slid back their door, and said. "Anything off the cart, dears?"

Naruto quickly glanced toward it, and then back to staring out of the window. He wasn't really hungry, and if he wanted some sweets, he always had some chocolate bars on him.

_'Shit! How did I become so addicted to chocolate? All this chocolate is going to be death of me'_

He saw Harry getting up, and buying himself some of everything.

Naruto himself would've done the same, he always loved exploring. But he already knew how all these candies tasted. He bought them, not so long ago, in the Diagon Alley.

Ron stared as Harry brought it all back in to the compartment and tipped it onto an empty seat.

"Hungry, are you?"

"Starving," said Harry, taking a large bite out of a pumpkin pasty

Ron had taken out a lumpy package and unwrapped it. There were four sandwiches inside. He pulled one of them apart and said, "She always forgets I don't like corned beef.."

"Swap you for one of these," said Harry, holding up a pasty. "Go on –"

"You don't want this, it's all dry," said Ron. "She hasn't got much time," he added quickly, "you know, with five of us."

"Go on, have a pasty," said Harry, and then turned to Naruto. "Don't you want any, Naruto?"

"No, thank you, I am not hungry." and went back to napping.

He was brought back to the world of consciousness by the knock on the door.

When he looked toward the door, he could see round face boy standing there, looking tearful.

"Sorry," he said, "but have you seen a toad at all?"

When they shook their heads, he wailed, "I've lost him! He keeps getting away from me!"

"He'll turn up," said Harry.

"Yes," said the boy miserably. "Well, if you see him..."

Naruto stayed quiet, not wanting to get involved.

And then boy left.

"Don't know why he's so bothered," said Ron. "If I'd brought a toad I'd lose it as quick as I could. Mind you, I brought Scabbers, so I can't talk."

Oh how wrong he was. One of the most famous shinobi in all Elemental Nations, actually had a summon contract with toads. Though he was right, regular toads are plan useless.

"He might have died and you wouldn't know the difference," said Ron in disgust. "I tried to turn him yellow yesterday to make him more interesting, but the spell didn't work. I'll show you, look..."

He rummaged around in his trunk and pulled out a very battered-looking wand. It was chipped in places and something white was glinting at the end.

"Unicorn hair's nearly poking out. Anyway-"

_'Yep'_ thought Naruto to himself. _'This family is _really_ poor.'_

He had just raised his wand when the compartment door slid open again. The toadless boy was back, but this time he had a girl with him. She was already wearing her new Hogwarts robes.

"Has anyone seen a toad? Neville's lost one," she said. She had a bossy sort of voice, lots of bushy brown hair, and rather large front teeth.

"We've already told him we haven't seen it," said Ron, but the girl wasn't listening, she was looking at the wand in his hand.

"Oh, are you doing magic? Let's see it, then."

She sat down. Ron looked taken aback.

"Er - all right."

"Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow,

Turn this stupid, fat rat yellow."

He waved his wand, but nothing happened. Scabbers stayed gray and fast asleep.

Hearing this, and then seeing the result, caused Naruto to burst out laughing. He couldn't help it, it was just too hilarious.

Ron went red.

"What's so funny?" demanded red head.

"You're an idiot, that's what. Ohh, I gotta shook hands with whoever told you this 'spell', I haven't laughed so hard in ages." answered shinobi.

"So what's you're saying is that this spell is not real?" asked Harry.

"Of course not! You must a complete idiot to actually think that it would work." said Naruto, still laughing.

Ron went even redder.

"Well, if you're so smart, why don't you do it?"

Naruto just smirked.

He took out his wand from his inner pocket, pointed it at still sleeping rat, and made a little swishing motion with it.

In a second, rat turned green.

Naruto continued smirking, while Ron openly gaped at him. But before red head could say anything, he was cut off by the bushy haired girl.

"Wow, you're really good. I've tried a few simple spells just for practice and it's all worked for me. Nobody in my family's magic at all, it was ever such a surprise when I got my letter, but I was ever so pleased, of course, I mean, it's the very best school of witchcraft there is, I've heard - I've learned all our course books by heart, of course, I just hope it will be enough - I'm Hermione Granger, by the way, who are you?"

She said all this very fast.

Naruto looked at her, amused by her antics. He looked at Harry and Ron, and saw that they both had the same stunned expression on their faces. He nearly burst out laughing _again_, at the look on their faces.

"Naruto Uchiha." answered raven haired ninja, still looking amused.

"I'm Ron Weasley." Ron mumbled.

"Harry Potter" said Harry.

"Are you really?" said Hermione. "I know all about you, of course - I got a few extra books, for background reading, and you're in Modern Magical History and The Rise and Fall of the Dark Arts and Great Wizarding Events of the Twentieth Century."

"Am I?" asked Harry.

"Goodness, didn't you know, I'd have found out everything I could if it was me," said Hermione. "Do either of you know what house you'll be in? I've been asking around, and I hope I'm in Gryffindor, it sounds by far the best; I hear Dumbledore himself was in it, but I suppose Ravenclaw wouldn't be too bad... Anyway, we'd better go and look for Neville's toad. You two had better change, you know, I expect we'll be there soon."

And she left, taking the toadless boy with her.

_'Heh, she can say a lot in one breath, I wonder what else she can _do_ in one breath_, _hehehe...'_ were perverted thoughts of Naruto.

"Whatever house I'm in, I hope she's not in it," he heard Ron saying, and then throwing his wand back into his trunk. "Stupid spell - George gave it to me, bet he knew it was a dud."

"Ah, so that's who I need to thank for providing me with some entertainment." commented Naruto, receiving glare in return.

"What house are your brothers in?" asked Harry, looking at Ron.

"Gryffindor," said Ron. Gloom seemed to be settling on him again. "Mom and Dad were in it, too. I don't know what they'll say if I'm not. I don't suppose Ravenclaw would be too bad, but imagine if they put me in Slytherin."

"That's the house Vol-, I mean, You-Know-Who was in?" asked Harry

"Yeah," said Ron. He flopped back into his seat, looking depressed.

"So what house do you think you will be in?" asked Ron after a few second.

"Oh, I don't know." mumbled Harry.

When Ron turned to Naruto, he received only one word in reply.

"Slytherin"

"Slytherin?" asked Ron, looking scandalized.

"Why would you want to be with those snakes?"

"Because Slytherin suits me the most." answered Naruto.

He didn't wait for Ron or Harry to comment on it, instead choosing to close his eyes, and take another short nap.

But once _again_ compartment door slid open.

Now, instead of bushy haired girl, and round faced boy, entered three boys.

"Are you fucking kidding me? What is this? A meeting room or something?" blue eyed shinobi yelled out, and stood up.

"You!" he pointed at the pale looking boy with blonde hair. "what do you want?" he demanded.

"I-i-i just wanted to see if it's true that Harry Potter is on the train." blonde boy stuttered out, while two bodyguard-like boys, stood behind him, in shock.

"Yes, it's true, there he is." he pointed at Harry. "Happy? Now get the fuck out, and don't come back!" yelled Naruto, and threw three boys outside, locking the door behind them.

"God, what do I have to do to get several minutes of silence?" he asked himself, and went back to his seat, to take yet _another _nap. Hopefully he won't get interrupted until they arrive at Hogwarts.

Though he missed the gaping looks of Harry and Ron, as he fell asleep.

A voice echoing through the train, was the one that woke him up.

"We will be reaching Hogwarts in five minutes' time. Please leave your luggage on the train, it will be taken to the school separately."

He quickly changed into the Hogwarts uniform. And before he knew it, he was standing on the dark platform, surrounded by the crowd of students.

"Firs' years! Firs' years over here!" He heard the voice calling.

He looked over the place where voice came from, and saw huge man, with big, hair face. His name was Hagrid, if he Naruto remembered right from what Harry told him.

"C'mon, follow me - any more firs' years? Mind yer step, now! Firs' years follow me!"

He followed, along with the rest of the students, who were slipping and stumbling on what seemed to be steep, narrow path.

"Yeh'll get yer firs' sight o' Hogwarts in a sec," Hagrid called over his shoulder, "jus' round this bend here."

There was a loud "Ooooh!"

The narrow path had opened suddenly onto the edge of a great black lake. Perched atop a high mountain on the other side, its windows sparkling in the starry sky, was a vast castle with many turrets and towers.

"No more'n four to a boat!" Hagrid called, pointing to a fleet of little boats sitting in the water by the shore.

Naruto sat down in one of them, not really paying attention who was with him in the boat.

"Everyone in?" shouted Hagrid, who had a boat to himself. "Right then - FORWARD!"

And the fleet of little boats moved off all at once, gliding across the lake, which was as smooth as glass. Everyone was silent, staring up at the great castle overhead. It towered over them as they sailed nearer and nearer to the cliff on which it stood.

"Heads down!" yelled Hagrid as the first boats reached the cliff; they all bent their heads and the little boats carried them through a curtain of ivy that hid a wide opening in the cliff face. They were carried along a dark tunnel, which seemed to be taking them right underneath the castle, until they reached a kind of underground harbor, where they clambered out onto rocks and pebbles.

"Oy, you there! Is this your toad?" said Hagrid, who was checking the boats as people climbed out of them.

"Trevor!" cried Neville blissfully, holding out his hands. Then they clambered up a passageway in the rock after Hagrid's lamp, coming out at last onto smooth, damp grass right in the shadow of the castle.

They walked up a flight of stone steps and crowded around the huge, oak front doo.r

"Everyone here? You there, still got yer toad?"

Hagrid raised a gigantic fist and knocked three times on the castle door.

The door swung open at once. A tall, black-haired witch in emerald-green robes stood there.

_'Tch, by the look on her face, you would think that she has a foot long stick up her ass. Damn, joking with her would be no fun, she will only get on my nerves after that.'_

"The firs' years, Professor McGonagall," said Hagrid.

"Thank you, Hagrid. I will take them from here."

She pulled the door wide. The entrance hall was pretty big. The stone walls were lit with flaming torches like the ones at Gringotts, the ceiling was too high to make out, and a magnificent marble staircase facing them led to the upper floors.

They followed Professor McGonagall across the flagged stone floor. Naruto could hear the drone of hundreds of voices from a doorway to the right - the rest of the school must already be here - but Professor McGonagall showed the first years into a small, empty chamber off the hall. They crowded in, standing rather closer together than they would usually have done, peering about nervously.

"Welcome to Hogwarts," said Professor McGonagall. "The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory, and spend free time in your house common room.

"The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rulebreaking will lose house points. At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honor. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours.

"The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting."

Her eyes lingered for a moment on Neville's cloak, which was fastened under his left ear, and on Ron's smudged nose.

"I shall return when we are ready for you," said Professor McGonagall. "Please wait quietly."

Naruto was waiting patiently for McGonagall to come back, when he heard several people scream behind him.

He looked around, only to see about twenty ghosts that just streamed through the back wall. Pearly-white and slightly transparent, they glided across the room talking to one another and hardly glancing at the first years. They seemed to be arguing. What looked like a fat little monk was saying: "Forgive and forget, I say, we ought to give him a second chance-"

"My dear Friar, haven't we given Peeves all the chances he deserves? He gives us all a bad name and you know, he's not really even a ghost - I say, what are you all doing here?"

A ghost wearing a ruff and tights had suddenly noticed the first years.

Nobody answered.

"New students!" said the Fat Friar, smiling around at them. "About to be Sorted, I suppose?"

A few people nodded mutely.

"Hope to see you in Hufflepuff!" said the Friar. "My old house, you know."

_'Yeah, right, Hufflepuff. Salazar would be laughing at me from his grave if I was to be sorted into Hufflepuff.'_

"Move along now," said a sharp voice. "The Sorting Ceremony's about to start."

Professor McGonagall had returned. One by one, the ghosts floated away through the opposite wall.

"Now, form a line," Professor McGonagall told the first years, "and follow me."

Naruto got into line, and they walked out of the chamber, back across the hall, and through a pair of double doors into the Great Hall.

When they entered the hall, sight which greeted them, amazed even Naruto. Hall was lit by thousands and thousands of candles that were floating in midair over four long tables, where the rest of the students were sitting. These tables were laid with glittering golden plates and goblets. At the top of the hall was another long table where the teachers were sitting. Professor McGonagall led the first years up here, so that they came to a halt in a line facing the other students, with the teachers behind them. The hundreds of faces staring at them looked like pale lanterns in the flickering candlelight. Dotted here and there among the students, the ghosts shone misty silver. Naruto looked up and saw a velvety black ceiling dotted with stars. He heard Hermione whisper, "Its bewitched to look like the sky outside. I read about it in Hogwarts, A History."

It was hard to believe there was a ceiling there at all, and that the Great Hall didn't simply open on to the heavens.

He wondered if he could make something like this, using seals.

When he looked back at Professor McGonagall, she was silently placing a four-legged stool in front of the first years. On top of the stool she put a pointed wizard's hat.

_'So that's Sorting Hat huh?'_ thought Naruto.

For a few seconds, there was complete silence. Then the hat twitched. A rip near the brim opened wide like a mouth - and the hat began to sing:

"Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,

But don't judge on what you see,

I'll eat myself if you can find

A smarter hat than me.

You can keep your bowlers black,

Your top hats sleek and tall,

For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat

And I can cap them all.

There's nothing hidden in your head

The Sorting Hat can't see,

So try me on and I will tell you

Where you ought to be.

You might belong in Gryffindor,

Where dwell the brave at heart,

Their daring, nerve, and chivalry

Set Gryffindors apart;

You might belong in Hufflepuff,

Where they are just and loyal,

Those patient Hufflepuffs are true

And unafraid of toil;

Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw, if you've a ready mind,

Where those of wit and learning,

Will always find their kind;

Or perhaps in Slytherin

You'll make your real friends,

Those cunning folk use any means

To achieve their ends.

So put me on! Don't be afraid!

And don't get in a flap!

You're in safe hands (though I have none)

For I'm a Thinking Cap!"

The whole hall burst into applause as the hat finished its song. It bowed to each of the four tables and then became quite still again.

As for Naruto...well, he thought that it was stupidest shit he ever heard.

Professor McGonagall now stepped forward holding a long roll of parchment.

"When I call your name, you will put on the hat and sit on the stool to be sorted," she said. "Abbott, Hannah!"

A pink-faced girl with blonde pigtails stumbled out of line, put on the hat, which fell right down over her eyes, and sat down. A moments pause -

"HUFFLEPUFF!" shouted the hat.

The table on the right cheered and clapped as Hannah went to sit down at the Hufflepuff table. Harry saw the ghost of the Fat Friar waving merrily at her.

"Bones, Susan!"

"HUFFLEPUFF!" shouted the hat again, and Susan scuttled off to sit next to Hannah.

"Boot, Terry!"

"RAVENCLAW!"

The table second from the left clapped this time; several Ravenclaws stood up to shake hands with Terry as he joined them.

"Brocklehurst, Mandy" went to Ravenclaw too, but "Brown, Lavender" became the first new Gryffindor, and the table on the far left exploded with cheers;

"Bulstrode, Millicent" then became a Slytherin

"Finch-Fletchley, Justin!"

"HUFFLEPUFF!"

"Finnigan, Seamus," the sandy-haired boy sat on the stool for almost a whole minute before the hat declared him a Gryffindor.

"Granger, Hermione!"

Hermione almost ran to the stool and jammed the hat eagerly on her head.

"GRYFFINDOR!" shouted the hat. He could hear Ron groaning, which caused him to snicker quietly.

When Neville Longbottom, the boy who kept losing his toad, was called, he fell over on his way to the stool. The hat took a long time to decide with Neville. When it finally shouted, "GRYFFINDOR," Neville ran off still wearing it, and had to jog back amid gales of laughter to give it to "MacDougal, Morag."

"Malfoy, Draco" the hat had barely touched his head when it screamed, "SLYTHERIN!"

Malfoy went to join his friends Crabbe and Goyle, looking pleased with himself.

There weren't many people left now. "Moon"..., "Nott"..., "Parkinson"..., then a pair of twin girls, "Patil" and "Patil"..., then "Perks, Sally-Anne"..., and then

"Potter, Harry!"

As Harry stepped forward, whispers suddenly broke out like little hissing fires all over the hall.

"Potter, did she say?"

"The Harry Potter?"

Naruto couldn't understand what was the big deal about Harry Potter. Didn't this wizards use logic at all?

Uchiha strongly suspected that so called defeat of Voldemort was caused by Harry's parents, but he just settled to watch Harry as he was being sorted.

And finally after several long minutes, hat yelled out "GRYFFINDOR!"

He watched as whole Gryffindor table cheered for him, and smirked. _'If I play my cards right, I might get some use out of you, Harry.'_

Naruto's focus went back to sorting ceremony, when he noticed that there were only four people, including himself, left to be sorted.

"Thomas, Dean," a Black boy even taller than Ron, joined Harry at the Gryffindor table. "Turpin, Lisa," became a Ravenclaw.

And then it was his turn.

"Uchiha, Naruto."

He walked up, and sat on the stool. Just like with Malfoy, hat barely touched his hair, when it yelled out. "SLYTHERIN!"

Naruto got up, smirking, and went to the Slytherin table, and sat between Malfoy and some girl with blond hair, and blue eyes, with Malfoy on right, and girl on the left side.

He barely paid any attention to Ron, who was sorted into Gryffindor.

Though he did pay attention to the boy by the name of Blaise Zabini, who was sorted into the house of Slytherin.

He turned to his left, and greeted blond girl.

"Hi there, name's Naruto."

"Daphne Greengrass, pleased to meet you." said smiling blond.

"Likewise" replied Naruto, flashing her one of his charming smiles, making her cheeks slightly pink.

He noticed that auburn haired girl with green eyes, that sat next to Daphne, nudged her in the ribs, and coughed.

"Oh yes, this is my friend Tracey Davis." said Daphne.

"Hi, it's nice to meet you, Naruto." said grinning Tracey, as she extended her arm to shook his.

Naruto, being the sneaky shinobi he was, quickly took her hand into his, and kissed it.

"I can say the same about you, Tracey" this of course caused poor girl to imitate a tomato.

He looked at the teacher's table, and noticed that Albus Dumbledore had gotten to his feet.

"Welcome," he said. "Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!

"Thank you!"

He sat back down. Everybody clapped and cheered.

_'Yep, old man is definitely off his rockers.'_

He looked back at his dishes, only to see that they were now piled with food.

"Hmm, not bad." he commented.

He was about to dig in, when somebody interrupted him.

"You, Uchiha." he turned to his right, to see smug looking Malfoy.

"Yes? Can I help you?"

"You were the one to yell at me on the train. I would seriously consider apologizing, after all, what is some simple, unknown name compared to Malfoy. You would do well to remember that."

Now _this_ seriously ticked him off. He was originally planning on just ignoring this brat, but after insulting Uchiha name? Oh no, he was going to get it!

"You know, _Malfoy._ It's considered polite to pray before eating." said Naruto, bowing his head a little, pretending to pray. Malfoy on the other hand, didn't even move a muscle.

"Oh? You seem to have forgotten how to pray. Let me help you." he said, grabbed back of Draco's head, and slammed it into the table, causing Malfoy to black out.

"Oh you poor thing, you must have been so exhausted to fall asleep like that. Wouldn't you say so girls?" He turned to his left, to see both girl staring at him with widened eyes, and their mouths open.

"Huh? Oh yes, definetly." said Tracey.

Daphne on the other hand just nodded.

After several minutes of eating various thing, and consuming dessert, everything disappeared, and Professor Dumbledore got to his feet again. The hall fell silent.

"Ahem - just a few more words now that we are all fed and watered. I have a few start-of-term notices to give you.

"First years should note that the forest on the grounds is forbidden to all pupils. And a few of our older students would do well to remember that as well."

Dumbledore's twinkling eyes flashed in the direction of the Weasley twins.

"I have also been asked by Mr. Filch, the caretaker, to remind you all that no magic should be used between classes in the corridors.

"Quidditch trials will be held in the second week of the term. Anyone interested in playing for their house teams should contact Madam Hooch.

"And finally, I must tell you that this year, the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a very painful death."

_'I'm not sure if I should be excited, or questioning his sanity'_

"And now, before we go to bed, let us sing the school song!" cried Dumbledore.

Dumbledore gave his wand a little flick, as if he was trying to get a fly off the end, and a long golden ribbon flew out of it, which rose high above the tables and twisted itself, snakelike, into words.

_'No way in fucking hell i'm gonna sin that shit.'_

"Everyone pick their favorite tune," said Dumbledore, "and off we go!"

And the school bellowed:

"Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,

Teach us something please,

Whether we be old and bald

Or young with scabby knees,

Our heads could do with filling

With some interesting stuff,

For now they're bare and full of air,

Dead flies and bits of fluff,

So teach us things worth knowing,

Bring back what we've forgot, just do your best, we'll do the rest,

And learn until our brains all rot."

Everybody finished the song at different times. At last, only the Weasley twins were left singing along to a very slow funeral march.

"Ah, music," he said, wiping his eyes. "A magic beyond all we do here! And now, bedtime. Off you trot!"

They stood up, and followed Slytherin Prefect, as he led them to what looked like cellars, and stopped in front of the wall. Crabbe and Goyle were draggin unconscious Malfoy by his arms.

"Listen up, this is the entrance that leads to the Slytherin common room. You will not, under any circumstances, reveal it to anybody from other houses, nor share our password with them."

"Pure-blood" said prefect, revealing a passage leading to the common room.

It was low-ceiling, dungeon-like room with greenish lamps and chairs.

The common room had lots of low backed black and dark green leather sofas with buttons, skulls, and dark wood cupboards. It had quite a grand atmosphere, but also quite a cold one.

"Password to the common room changes every fortnight, and it is posted on the noticebar." announced prefect.

He then showed which way was boys' and girls' dormitory rooms.

Naruto bid a goodnight to his two new friends, and made his way to boys' dormitory.

When he entered, he could see walls decorated with Slytherin crests, and silver lantern hung from the ceiling.

There were many ancient four-posters with green silk hanging.

He eagerly hopped onto the bed, and pulled it's hangings shut.

_'Ah, this is pretty comfortable. Still, it's not as bad as I thought it will be. I still have whole year here, so I better make it exciting. But now it's time to sleep. Ugh, I only just noticed how tired I am'_ thought Naruto as he yawned, and pulled bed sheets over his body.

He fell asleep immediately, dreaming about orgies with schoolgirls.

* * *

><p><strong>WHOOOOOSHA! Done!<strong>

**Tell me what you think. Tell me if I suck, scream to me if it's awesome. And do whatever the hell ****you want! And of course don't foget to ask as much questions as you want!**

**A/N:**

**Yes, i know, i threw a lot of useless junk in this chapter(like songs and shit), but i couldn't help it, i think that shit is hilarious.**

**And if somebody is interested as to why Naruto brough _three_ pair of guns...well, let's just say that it has something to do with one of the Rinnegan's paths. So i will just leave it to you guys to guess, why exactly he brought three pair of guns.(If you guessed it right, you're awesome!)**

**And BTW, i need find some cool names for guns, and i want you guys to help me. So leave your suggestions!**

**P.S: I will not update till we reach 100 REVIEWS!...Nah, i'm just kidding...or am i?...DUN DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN!**

**And now for some info:**

**Two- way storage seal -** **It works on any distance, and has capacity of the average storage scroll. When something is stored in it, second scroll turns red.**

****Camouflage seal******** - Can apply only to object with maximum width and height being 3 meters. It masks anything that it is applied on, making it completely invisible. (Example: If applied to the box, which has something inside it, then everything will become invisible, not just the box itself.)****

**Guns**** - Yes, i took it's design from 'Hellsing'. Imagine, Jackal, but white one.**

**See ya next time!**


	4. So this is Hogwarts, huh?

**Hello to all of my loyal readers! I present you – new THOS chapter! Yes, your eyes are not deceiving you, it is indeed a new chapter!**

**And as I promised to some of you, it will have a lemon!(Which will hopefully receive the 'Jiraya-sama's seal of approval.')**

**And btw, sorry for those useless songs and stuff in the last chapter, I only added them 'cause I think they are hilarious. But if you don't like them...that's too bad for you. **

**What? You expected me to apologize again? Hell no, one time is more than enough.**

**Oh and one more thing, this chapter was a bit rushed(wrote it in only two days), so please bear with it if you find some mistakes.**

**AAAAAAAAND I'll see at the end of the chapter!**

* * *

><p>"Garlic" - speech<p>

_'Will'_ – thoughts

"**Give" - Demon/Summon and such speech**

_**'You'** –_ **Demon/Summon/etc. thoughts**

"**Crabs"** - Jutsu/Spells/Something wizard or ninja related.

* * *

><p><em>Previously on THOS:<em>

_Naruto learned about the new world, he found himself in. He arrived to Britain, and was accepted to Hogwarts. But before moving to Britain, Naruto visited America, where he stole a lot of money, and picked up several interesting things._

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 4 <strong>

**So this is Hogwarts, huh?**

When Naruto woke up next morning, it was around five in the morning.

He quickly made his way out of his bed, and got dressed in Hogwarts uniform, even though he didn't like it.

When he exited Slytherin common room, he made several**Shadow Clones** and sent them to explore the castle, in case the map that of Hogwarts, that Sazalar kindly left in his journal, needed any adjustments.

After seeing his clones scatter in random directions, he headed outside, to get his usual morning exercises done.

He found a good spot at the shore of the black lake, away from unnecessary spectators.

By the time he finished working out, practicing his fighting styles and several jutsu, it was already seven in the morning.

When raven haired Uchiha returned into the castle, he decided to take a relaxing bath, to have some peace and quiet before his busy day starts.

After his relaxing bath, when he was neat and clean, he headed toward the great hall to get his breakfast.

When he finally arrived to the great hall, it was already eight in the morning, and almost everybody was there.

Naruto made his way toward Slytherin table, not paying much attention to anybody in the great hall.

When he was near his house's table, he spotted two girls that he introduced himself to, Daphne Greengrass and Tracey Davis, sitting there, in the middle of the corwdif Slytherin students.

They spotted him when he started heading their way, and they waved at him, making him wave back in return and smile at them.

Daphne and Tracey moved to their sides, and gestured Naruto to sit between them.

He obligated without any questions.

"Good morning Daphne, Tracey, how are you this morning?" asked Uchiha as he sat down, and helped himself to some salad and potatoes.

"I'm feeling very excited. I can't wait to start learning some magic. And what about you, Naruto?" asked back Daphne.

But before Naruto was even able to let out a single sound, Tracey started talking.

"I'm in same mood as Daphne. I really want to learn how to do magic. I mean, my dad showed me some spells and stuff, but he never taught me anything serious, said that I needed to learn it at school." Tracey started rambling.

All this time, Naruto just watched in amusement as auburn haired girl started telling him about how excited she was.

And after several more minutes of girl's rambling, she quieted down and, Naruto noted, she started looking nervous, fidgeting in her seat a little, and playing with her fingers.

"And i'm also a little bit nervous." said Tracey almost in whisper, and looking around.

"Any reason why?" asked Naruto.

Emerald eyed girl looked around one more time, and then leaned closer to Naruto.

"It's well...nobody knows expect Daphne, and she only found out because we're childhood friends, but I think I can trust you." whispered Tracey, smiling slightly, despite her nervous state.

"Don't worry, you can trust me." smiled Naruto warmly in return. _'Stupid girl, i'm the last person you should trust.'_

"Okay, well, here goes" she took a deep breath, and whispered into his ear. "I am half-blood."

As soon as those words left her mouth, there was audible gasp from Naruto, who looked at her as if she was some sort of criminal.

Uchiha pointed shaking finger at her, as if in shock.

"You...you..."

By this point, Tracey looked almost in tears.

"So what of it?" he deadpanned, causing Tracey pause.

"Huh?" confusion was written all over her face, tears long forgotten.

Seeing that look on her face, Naruto burst out laughing.

"Sorry sorry, couldn't help it." he managed to say between his laughter.

After a minute of laughing, he calmed down a little, and was now chuckling quietly.

"What's so funny?" asked Tracey with a huff, and puffed out her cheeks, which were slightly red.

This unfortunately caused Naruto to laugh once again.

"Ah...ahh...ahh...i'm really sorry for laughing, you just look so cute and adorable when you make that face." was Uchiha's answer.

It took Tracey several second to process what he said, and when she finally did, her face became so red, Naruto thought she was going to explode.

Out of the corner of his eye, raven haired shinobi saw Daphne giggling quietly at the scene, that was playing out before her.

"I...uhm...thank you?" she managed to stutter out, not sure what else to say.

"You're welcome." he told Tracey, and grinned.

"And as for your earlier question, Daphne, I am feeling pretty good, thank you." said Uchiha as he turned toward blonde girl, sitting on his left.

"And Tracey, you really shouldn't put that much trust into the person, who you met only once, and especially if said person is from Slytherin. After all, there are some fellas who would sell their own mother, just to get what they want."

_'Myself included' _he mentally added.

"Even though I don't really cared about that blood purity stuff, some others might, so be more careful ok?" Naruto whispered into Tracey ear, and then winked at her.

Tracey, who was pretty flustered by this point, either from embarrassment or from close proximity, he didn't really care, just nodded.

Before he could even open his mouth, he felt Daphne's hand on his own, which was under the table.

He turned to his left, and looked at her with questioning gaze.

Daphne leaned closer to him, and quietly whispered, so only he could hear.

"Thank you for that, it really took her a lot courage to tell anybody about it, besides me." she gave his hand a squeeze, and withdrew her own back to her lap.

"No problem." smirked Naruto.

"So what do we have first on our schedule today?" asked blue eyed Uchiha when he finished his breakfast.

"Potions." was Daphne's short answer.

He looked at Tracey, and then at Daphne.

Seeing that they both finished their breakfast as well, he stood up, gesturing for them to follow.

"Let's get going then, it wouldn't hurt to be few minutes earlier." he told them, as they made their way out of the great hall.

**F**ollowing days flew by pretty quickly.

Naruto, as he suspected, was by far the best student in his year.

He was always the one to finish given assignment first, most of which he got on his first try, and answer any questions that teachers asked. After all, it just wouldn't do if Uchiha was not the best.

There were several classes that Naruto found useful. They were: Potions, Transfiguration, Charms and Defence Against Dark Arts.

Potions were pretty easy, and Naruto took a liking to it.

He also found out that head of the Slytherin house, Severus Snape, or Professor Snape as students called him, clearly favored members of his own house. He took points from other houses, and awarded his house with points, every chance he got.

And by the look of it, Naruto was one of his most favorite students, even if he didn't show it.

His second favorite subject was Transfiguration, which was taught by Professor McGonagall, a woman who led them to the great hall, on their first day.

On their first lesson on Transfiguration, McGonagall gave them a little speech.

"Transfiguration is some of the most complex and dangerous magic you will learn at Hogwarts, anyone messing around in my class will leave and not come back. You have been warned." she said.

Then she changed her desk into a pig and back again.

Many students thought that it would be what they were about to do. Those student were in for one big disappointment.

She told them that it was too soon for them to start learning this stuff.

Naruto didn't argue. He didn't really have any reason to, he could just practice more advanced stuff on his own.

She then gave them a match, and told them to turn it into a needle.

By the end of the lesson, only several students expect him made any progress. They managed to turn their matches silver, and some even managed to make it pointy.

He himself didn't really care much about what others did. He turned his match into a needle on his first try, and leaned back into his chair to relax.

Professor McGonagall was impressed, if the look on her face, after she saw him do it on his first try, indicated anything. Hell, she even awarded him with 10 points.

Next there was Charms class. Charms were being taught by a tiny man by the name Filius Flitwick, or, as students referred to him, Professor Flitwick.

They didn't do much at first, only theory about charms and such. Though he showed them a spell in his last lesson.

And then there was his least favorite class – D.A.D.A.

It wasn't that Naruto didn't like this particular subject, problem was in professor, if you could call him that.

At first, he had high expectations about DADA, but after actually attending one of the lessons, he was greatly disappointed.

Quirinus Quirrell, man who taught DADA, was a complete joke, stuttering like a fool, and jumping after hearing some noise behind him.

Naruto, at first thought that he was just an idiot, who got this position by chance.

But after spending several hours in his classes, his trained eye picked up some moves that were clearly out of character for some random fool like Quirrell.

And that was when he started keeping a closer eye on him. He followed him around for quite some time. Though at first there wasn't anything too much unusual about him, he caught him walking around the halls at night, and mumbling something to himself. One more thing that Naruto noticed was that when he was alone, he walked..._different_.

Usually when he surrounded by students, he gave off the feeling of unsureness, insecurity, nervousness and fear. But when he was alone, he was confident, so sure of himself.

But what reason would a professor have to act like that?

Maybe he was just hiding something, and was afraid of getting caught, or maybe it was just an act, and he had some secret identity.

He couldn't be hundred percent sure, he needed to find out more about him to know what this man was playing at exactly.

And there was also this one suspicious fact that Naruto found out about Quirrell.

When he looked at him with his Sharingan active, he saw a large build up of chakra at the back of stuttering fool's head. It was as there was something that was sucking out his chakra, and with it, his life force.

Uchiha Naruto was never one to give up on something if he really wanted it, and at the moment, he _really_ wanted to find out just what in the fucking hell was Quirrell's deal.

But suspicious professors aside, he had classes to attend, and things to do.

And of course Naruto knew that there would be some useless classes.

For raven haired shinobi, those classes were Astronomy, History of Magic and Herbology.

He could think of several cases where knowledge, given by this subjects, would be _mildly_ useful. Though in the end, he could think only of the situations in which only normal civilians would need it.

But even if he thought that he needed those classes like he needed a second asshole, he still was the first student to finished given task, and answer all questions that were asked.

There was also one more interesting thing that he learned on Friday – Professor Snape really _really_ did not like Harry Potter for some unknown reason.

He would just put it in his 'Find out later' mental journal.

It was already Sunday, and all in all, first week in Hogwarts went pretty smoothly for young shinobi.

He went to classes, gained some points for his house, explored every corner in the castle, and made acquaintance with several people from different houses. But he mainly was seen in company of Daphne Greengrass and Tracey Davis. Also, he tried to avoid Draco Malfoy as much as possible, little brat was getting on his nerves everyday.

And now, after one whole week of being in Hogwarts, he decided that he would finally visit famed Chamber of Secrets.

After several minutes of walking from dungeons toward the second floor, he was standing in front of the girls' lavatory, which was dubbed as Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. He really hoped that annoying ghost was sulking somewhere else.

He mildly wondered why on earth would old bastard, build entrance to his secret chamber in place like this. But after several more seconds of thinking about it, he shook his head.

_'What does it matter where entrance is, I should be thinking about huge ass basilisk down there.'_

It seemed that lady Luck was on his side this time, because there was no trace of mopping ghost.

He came closer to the sink, and hissed.

"_Open."_

And at once the tap glowed with a brilliant white light and began to spin. Next second, the sink began to move; the sink, in fact, sank, right out of sight, leaving a large pipe exposed, a pipe wide enough for a man to slide into.

_'Trust that old bastard to make an amusement park out of his chamber.'_ thought Naruto as he looked at wide pipe.

He looked at it for several more seconds, and sighed. _'Better get this over with' _

Next second, Naruto jumped into the pipe, and let himself slide down.

After several about a minute of sliding down the pipe at high speed, he finally flew out of pipe, and landed on his feet.

Surface, on which Naruto was now standing, was damp floor of a dark stone tunnel large enough to stand in.

And he just now noticed that his clothes were covered in slime.

_'Well shit, now I have to clean it up. Just great.'_

He looked around the tunnel he was in, and he came to quick and simple conclusion.

_'It's dark as fuck!'_

"**Lumos"** said Naruto, and outstretched his hand, his open palm facing upward. And next second, glowing orb of light appeared in the palm of his hand.

He made his way through the dark tunnel, and only noise he made, was slapping sound of his feet hitting wet floor.

As he walked in deeper, he felt himself step on something, and hear some kind of a crunching sound.

He lowered his hand to the floor, and crouched down to the balls of his feet. Floor under his feet was littered with small animal bones, and it seems that he stepped on one of them.

_'Now that's nasty. Oh well, I will send some clones later to clean this shit up. Can't have _my_ new secret place be a dump.'_

Making a mental note for later, Naruto kept moving forward, but stopped once again upon noticing something big, up ahead.

He activated his Sharingan, and moved closer to it. Upon closer look, he could see that it was a snake skin, that basilisk most probably shed. It was poisonous green in color, and was lying curled across the tunnel.

_'Yep, he sure wasn't lying when he wrote that there _huge_ ass basilisk down here' _thought Uchiha, as he eyed shedded snake skin, that was _at least_ twenty feet long.

After several more minutes of examining snake skin, he moved forward once again, and thankfully there wasn't anything in his was now.

_'God dammit! How many stupid turns does this tunnel have anyway'_ thought Naruto in frustration as he made yet _another_ turn.

And after several more minutes of walking through the dark and curvy tunnel, he reached a solid wall.

_'HAHA! Fuck you, tunnel! You thought that you could bore me to death huh? Fat chance, bitch! Nothing can stop great Uchiha Naruto-sama! Bwahahaha!'_

When _slightly_ insane shinobi got his thoughts under control, he got a good look at the wall that was in front of him. Said wall had two entwined serpents carved on it, their eyes set with great, glinting emerald.

_'Tch, crazy, ancient asshole had a bad addiction to color green. But who am I to talk, I got even worse addiction to color black, and slightly smaller addiction to green.'_

"_Open up" _hissed Uchiha.

The serpents parted as the wall cracked open, the halves slid smoothly out of sight, and Naruto walked inside, his excitement rising by the second.

He was standing at the end of a long, dimly lit chamber. Towering stone pillars entwined with more serpents, rose to a ceiling lost in darkness, casting long, black shadows through the odd, greenish gloom that filled the place.

Then, as he drew level with the last pair of pillars, a statue high as the Chamber itself loomed into view, standing against the back wall.

It was face of Salazar Slytherin.

_'Oh come on, I'm changing that thing into something else ASAP. Probably to something more welcoming, like my face. Yep, my own face will do nicely instead of that old bastard's. Now what was it that you needed to say here?...Hmm...Oh Yeah! Now I remember.'_

"_Speak to me, Slytherin, greatest of the Hogwarts Four!"_ hissed Naruto, looking at the statue.

Slytherin's gigantic stone face was moving. Naruto saw Salazar's mouth opening, wider and wider, to make a huge black hole.

And something was stirring inside the statue's mouth. Something was slithering up from its depths.

_'Basilisk'_ thought Naruto, and closed his eyes.

"_Who isss there?" _hissed king of serpents, as it came out of statue's mouth, and dropped on the cold, wet floor.

"_My name is Naruto Uchiha, descendant of Salazar Slytherin, and heir of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Slytherin." _blue eyed Uchihahissed back.

Basilisk looked at at Naruto with calculating gaze, and even though he couldn't see it, he could clearly feel it.

After several moments of complete silence, Basilisk finally started hissing.

"_If you are who you claim to be, then open your eyes, and look into mine. If you are indeed a Slytherin, then my gaze will not affect you, Master Salazar made sure of that, but if you are not, then you will die."_

_'Better not activate my Sharingan, who knows what will happen. Note for later: experiment with Sharingan and Basilisk.'_

He hesitantly opened his eyes, and into Basilisk's yellow orbs.

Several seconds passed as young Uchiha and King of Serpents looked into each others eyes.

Finally after several more seconds of staring, basilisk bowed it's head.

"_Young master" _it hissed.

"_Just Naruto, or Master Naruto if you can't help it. Now, what is your name?" _asked Naruto_._

"_Greenella, Master Naruto." _answered green colored serpent.

Naruto just mumbled something incoherent about old bastards addicted to color green.

He suddenly paused and looked at Greenella's head.

"_I should've noticed earlier that you were a female. Guess I got a little distracted by staring in your eyes." _concluded Naruto.

"_Indeed, I am."_

"_Do you mind if I call you just Ella? Greenella is a bit mouthful." _

_Queen_ of Serpents answered with a short nod of her head.

"_Well then, I'm gonna go now. Also I am going to leave several **Shadow Clones** – they are copies of myself – to clean this place up. So if you need anything at all, just tell one them, and I will know. Also I will try to visit as much as I can to talk to you. What do you say?"_

"_It would be greatly appreciated, Master Naruto. It can get very lonely, being alone for several centuries."_

Naruto gave a curt nod.

"_I see you later then, Ella." _were his parting words to Serpent Queen, as he made his was out of the chamber.

_'Maybe I should add the lift or something? It can get pretty annoying running up the wall from down there, and no way in hell I'm using that ladder like some common civilian.'_ thought Uchiha, as he exited girls' bathroom.

It was long past curfew, so he kept as quiet as possible, trying not to alert that old bastard, and his cat. Of course there was no way in hell that Filch would be able to detect him, but it wouldn't hurt to be cautious.

He made his way through the second floor corridors, and was about to head downstairs, when he hear some soft sound.

If he was anybody else, he would surely miss it. Oh no, he wasn't just anybody, he was Uchiha 'fucking' Naruto, he never misses anything...well, almost anything.

He followed the sound, and came upon a door, which if he remembered right, led to the unused classroom.

He pressed his earn to the door, trying to make out what it was.

And just seconds after, his eyes widened to an impossible size. Sound that was coming from the classroom – as unexpected as it was – was moaning.

And by the sound of it, it was female.

He quickly whipped out a piece of paper out if his inner pocket, which was actually a seal that Naruto made beforehand, and plastered it on the door.

Suddenly, right under the area where seal was applied, square shaped zone became transparent, and he could see right through the door.

Sight that greeted him, instantly made him grin like a lunatic, but also _very_ uncomfortable in his pants

There, on one of the desks, in the middle of the classroom, sat purple haired girl, around sixteen or seventeen if Naruto had to guess, her black robes and jumper on the floor, near the desk. Her plain white buttoned shirt hang loose open by her sides, showing her medium sized breasts. Her legs were spread wide open, while her skirt was pulled up to her waist, and her pink panties were hanging on one of her ankles.

It was pretty dark, and from what Naruto could see, she a heart shaped face, dark eyes that seemed to twinkle in the moonlight, and short, spiky hair, which was purple.

But he could clearly see what she was doing – she was masturbating.

Her left hand was massaging one of her breasts, and she was fingering herself with her right.

And now that he thought about it, she was moaning pretty loudly.

With great difficulty, he tore his eyes from the scene before him, and looked up at the ceiling, quietly clapped his hands together, and muttered silent 'Thank you'.

He quickly looked back at the girl, and saw that she was about to finish.

Without second thought, he tore his seal from the door, and fazed through the wall, and into the room with almost naked girl.

He fazed in, just in time to see her climax, and moan loudly – well, even louder than before.

Naruto silently made his way toward her, coming from behind her.

"Now isn't this just delicious sight hmm?" he asked loudly.

This caused purple haired girl to almost jump. She immediately turned her head around, not having enough strength to move her body, while her hair color changed to bright red.

_'I'll ask her later about it' _though Naruto, after seeing her hair change color.

"Who are you? How did you get in? I locked the door and – " she couldn't finish her sentence because Naruto cut her off.

"It doesn't matter" and clamped his lips on her.

Her mouth opened in schock, and Naruto, not once to miss such an opportunity, slid his tongue in her mouth and started eagerly exploring, and somehow positioning himself between her legs while kissing her.

She didn't even move for several seconds, but then, as if something clicked inside her, she responded to him with her own, lust filled kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck, and her legs around his waist.

_'It's most likely because of her post-orgasmic high, she probably even thinks that this is not real.' _concluded Naruto.

_She is definitely several inches taller than I am' _noted Naruto, as he eyed her up and down.

His hands found her breasts, and he started playing with them, and occasionally pinching her nipples.

As he detached his mouth from hers, and started planting kisses down her neck, while his right hand slid down, and started fingering her exposed core.

Girl's moans got even louder by this point.

His mouth found her right breast, and he started sucking on it, while making circular motions with his tongue around her nipple, while his other hand played with her left nipple. And at the same time as his mouth claimed her right boob, he plunged two of his fingers inside her wet pussy, and started pumping them in and out.

He did this for several more minutes, occasionally switching between her tits and mouth, until she started moaning something incoherent, which Naruto guessed, she was trying to tell him that she was close to climax.

This only encouraged Naruto to add one more fingers, and pump thrust them even faster than before.

Now red haired teen couldn't take it anymore, her scream of pure pleasure could be heard all over the castle, if not for the Silencing charm, that Naruto put around the room, when he fazed in.

Girl, that was holding to Naruto for dear life moments earlier, collapsed on the desk, slightly panting, her eyes locked on the ceiling, and mouth open in pleasure.

Naruto looked at his hand, that was covered in female juices, as he brought it near his face.

He licked juices off his pinkie and ring fingers.

"Hmm...you taste pretty good." he told her, which she seemingly didn't even acknowledge.

For a moment he even considered eating her out, but decided against it, instead choosing to put his index and middle fingers, that were still covered in her juices, into her mouth, on which she started unconsciously sucking.

He played with her tongue a little, but after a moment, withdrew his fingers her mouth, that were covered by her saliva, and traced them down her neck, causing her to moan. He put his palm under her chin, and his thumb in her mouth, which she again started sucking on unconsciously.

While she was sucking on his fingers, he unbuckled his pants, and slid them down along with boxers, and threw them aside with his foot, revealing his hard member.

"No time to rest!" he said with a huge grin on his face, and entered her in one quick thrust.

Girl under him, clearly not expecting it, opened her mouth in silent scream.

Naruto, not wasting any time, put his hands on her hips, and started pounding into her mercilessly.

Dark eyed girl, didn't waste any time either, wrapping her arms around his back, and her legs around his waist, bringing him closer to her.

Seeing this, Naruto put his left arm on her lower back, while his right arm played her tits, and started kissing her passionately, gesture that she eagerly returned with the same passion in it.

After about five minutes of going like this, Naruto heard her moan out some incoherent words between panting, kisses and gasping for air, some of which he managed to understand.

"Good...pant...so good...pant...faster!...pant...HARDER!" she finally screamed.

Naruto, not one to disappoint, started thrusting into her much faster and even harder than before.

They went like this for couple more minutes, that were filled with loud moans from red haired girl, and groans of pleasure coming from Naruto.

Finally, after several more moments, they were about to cum, and even though girl didn't say it, he could tell that she was close by the way she started clinging on to him desperately.

Naruto, letting out final roar, came inside of her, spraying her vagina with his semen.

As he, along with his new lover, slumped down on on the desk, which was now covered in their combined fluids, he laid his head on chest, and her legs and arms dropped from his waist and back to his sides, he looked up to her.

Look on her face made Naruto chuckle.

Almost naked girl, that was laying under him, seemed to be floating on cloud nine.

They lay there like that for almost fifteen minutes, Naruto's half erect penis still inside of her, until the girl, who's hair started rapidly changing from current red to yellow, to greyish blue, to purple, to pink, back to red, only this time it was darker shade of it, and finally stopping at brown, started at the shinobi laying on top of her.

Naruto lifted his head, putting his chin on her chest, instead of his cheek, one hand wrapped around her back, which she lay on, and his other gripping one of her ass cheeks firmly, and stared back at her.

"Yo" he said almost in whisper, giving her a charming smile.

She looked at him for couple more seconds, before dropping her head back on desk, and covering her dace with her hands.

"Oh God, it was _real, _I just had sex with a complete stranger...i acted like a complete whore, oh my god.." she groaned out, and started crying, if Naruto's guess was right.

Her whimpering and mumbling on how ashamed she was with herself started gradually getting on Uchiha nerves, so he desided to put an end to it.

"Hey, stop it" no reaction.

"Will you quit it already?" he asked with annoyed.

Still no reaction. He decided that it was time to act.

He sat up to be on her eye level, still lodged inside her, took her hand in his, put them away from her face, and putting his palms on her cheeks, turned her head to look into her eyes.

"Look at me!" he commanded harshly.

When he looked into her eyes, he could see that they were bloodshot red, and her face was all wet from sweat and tears.

"Yes we had sex, yes we are complete strangers, but at least you enjoyed it, didn't you?" he asked with, smirking.

This, apparently, was wrong thing to say, because now she looked even more ashamed.

He sighed.

"Look, I am no good with crying women, and you're not helping here, so try to listen to what I have to say OK?"

She gave a hesitant nod.

"Good." he gave her a quick peck on the lips, which she didn't have time to return, or turn away from.

Seeing that he finally her attention, he began to speak.

"As I said before, we are complete strangers, and we enjoyed the sex we had couple of minutes ago, so what can we do about?"

But before she could even open her mouth, he already gave her an answer to his own question.

"First thing we must do is get to know each other, so we _won't_ be complete strangers, so how does that sound?"

"Sound okay." she answered after several seconds, albeit little hesitantly.

"I'll go first then, so you would know what to do." he said, and started introducing himself, without waiting for a reply.

"My name is Naruto Uchiha, I was born in Japan, but moved here with my dad, due to him getting a job here. I like fighting, guns and fast cars. I do not like weak and annoying people. My hobbies are shooting, driving at really high speed, and being the best at everything I want. And my goals for the future...hmm...haven't thought about it yet." he finished with a humorous grin on his face.

"Your turn now." he said, gesturing for her to start.

"Wait! Naruto Uchiha...i heard that name before. Weren't you one of the first years that were sorted a week ago? I remember your name because I thought it sounds funny." said now purple haired girl, looking thoughtful.

"Yeah, I'm one of the first years, so what?"

" Ugh...not only did I loose my virginity to a stranger, I lost it to an eleven year old kid." she groaned.

"To a kid, who's dick is still inside you. And for your information, I'm gonna be twelve in one month." he replied.

She looked down, her eyes widened, and her face and hair turned into a very dark shade of red.

_'She probably didn't even realize it, until I pointed it out.'_ thought Naruto, as he gauged her reaction.

She tried to pull back, but Naruto held her in place by her hips.

"And for fuck's sake, to I look like a kid to you?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

She stopped struggling beneath him, and looked at him up and down, as if seeing him for the first time.

_'Now that I got a good look at him, I got to admit, he's pretty handsome.' _she thought to herself, but didn't actually say it.

"Well, no but – "

"But what?"

"But people will – " she didn't get to finish what she wanted to say, due to Naruto lips crashing on hers.

This time, she started responding after several seconds of hesitation.

"People don't have to know." he said when he pulled away from her, minute after he started kissing her.

She gave him a nod, but spotted a mischievous grin on his face.

Second later she him slap her on the ass.

"Ouch. What was that for?" she asked, and playfully hit him on the chest with the back of her hand.

"For getting side trekked. And don't tell me that you didn't enjoy it." she didn't answer, instead choosing to turn her head to the side, not daring to look him in the eyes.

Seeing this, made Naruto grin even wider.

"Now get on with your introduction. You know about me much more than I know about you, Ms. I-like-to-get-spanked." he told her with a wink.

If it was possible, her face became even redder, though she managed to get it under control a minute later.

"My name is Nymphadora Tonks, but don't call me by my first name, I would prefer if you called me just Tonks."

"Why would you want that? Nymphadora is a beautiful name, a bit mouthful if anything."

"Well, I don't like it! People always make fun of me because of it."Tonks replied with a huff.

"I don't make fun you, do I? As I said, I think it's a very beautiful name."

"You were serious?"

"Of course I was, why I would I lie to you after just meeting you?" '_Actually I can think of hundreds of reasons why I would, but she doesn't need to know that.'_

"And again, as I said, it's a bit mouthful, so I will have to call you something shorter...hmm...Nym or Nymmy, yep that sounds nice. Oh don't give me that look, you know you like it." he said, spotting a look of irritation on her face.

But even though she acted irritated, she was smiling.

"Then I'm just going to call you Naru, just Nar." she smirked, which caused him to laugh loudly.

"What's so funny?" wondering what could make him laugh so hard all of a sudden.

"it's just that we already had sex, kissed, cuddled, and now we are giving each other pet names. All we need to do now, is to go on a date, and we will be, what people consider, a couple."

Newly dubbed Nymmy, blushed and started giggling, though she was interrupted by the sound of smacking.

"Why did you spank me this time for?"

"For getting side trekked, again."

"But I wasn't the one who -"

SMACK.

"Doesn't matter." Naruto cut her off with smirk, and upon seeing her flustered, but annoyed face, gave a peck on the lips, which he returned with one of her own.

She was about to continue her introduction, when she was interrupted yet again.

"Hold on for a second, I am getting pretty tired of standing like this."

He looked around the room, and spotted a chair that was on the other side of the room.

He extended his hand in armchair's direction, and silently said.

"**Banshō Ten'in****"**

Tonks thought that she saw his eyes change for a moment, but brushed it aside as nothing more than light playing tricks with her.

"What are you -" she abruptly stopped talking, and watched in fascination as chair flew into Naruto's hand.

Uchiha skillfully caught the chair, and put behind him.

"Hey Nym, hold on to me, will you?"

Before she could ask what he meant, he grabbed her ass, while her legs rested on his elbows, and started lifting her in the air, holding her against him. Seeing what he was doing, Tonks quickly put her arms around his neck.

He took a step back, still holding Nymphadora, and sat down on the char, bringing her down along with himself, causing his fully erect member to go even deeper inside her.

When he made himself comfortable in his seat, he withdrew his arms from under her legs, causing them to drop on his sides, and touch the floor. He quickly grabbed her butt cheeks with his hands, only this time putting his elbows on her hips.

"So what do you think of our new position?" asked Naruto, and looked up, due to his eyes being on her mouth level, only to see her eyes closed, and funny expression on her face, which he guessed was pleasure.

"So I take it, you like it hmm?"

She quickly bobbed her head up and down.

"Why a-are you so h-hard again?" she stuttered out after a second.

"You're not the only one who was affected by all the kissing, groping and moving that we did. And stop moving, or I'm not gonna be responsible for my actions." he told her when he felt her hips move back and forth.

_'So she finally accepted the idea of us having sex huh? That's good.' _

"Then don't be" was her simple reply, as she grabbed his hair, pulled his head back, and brought her mouth down on his, silencing him.

"You asked for it." he managed to make out, as he broke the kiss after two minutes.

He started eagerly pounding into her, while she bounced up and down in his lap.

His mouth found her neck, and he started planting kisses on her throat, meanwhile his hands were all over her body, exploring it, and memorizing every inch of her.

Finally his hands settled down on her hips, in a wise grip, as his thrusting started to get much rougher and faster.

They kept going at this pace five more minutes, Naruto occasionally letting out deep groans, while she moaned loudly the while time, locks of his hair still in her balled fists which she used to hold him close to her, and all the while, her breasts kept rubbing against a rough material of the jumper that Naruto still wore.

"I-I'm close, I'm gonna cum any second now." she panted out.

"Go ahead, I'm close too." he mumble against her neck, and pulled away a little.

He put his left hand on the back of her head, and brought it down, meeting it halfway in passionate kiss.

Mere second after he kissed her, her inner walls tightened around his rock-hard member that was lodged deep inside of her, and she screamed into his mouth, but didn't stop their tongue wrestling even for a moment.

All this sent Naruto over the edge, and he followed her orgasm with his own, as he sent ropes of his semen into her wet pussy, letting out a roar, that was muffed by her mouth.

Their bodies were all sweaty from the love making that they were doing, but they still held each other close, basking in their high, not paying any attention to anything besides them.

"My my, Miss Tonks, taking advantage of poor and innocent first year like that, tsk tsk." he scolded her playfully.

She lifted her head from his shoulder, where it lay, and snorted, looking at him with amusement.

"Innocent, my ass. You were the one who took advantage of me, you pervert." This made Naruto chuckle at her accusation. He didn't even try to deny it, he knew it was true.

"And speaking about that delicious ass of yours, you better get on with your introduction before we decide to have a round three. After all, all I learned about you is your name, and that you do not like to be called by your first name."

"Well, let's see, as you probably already guessed, I am a **Metamorphmagus**." she started, and was about to continue, when Naruto interrupter her with a question.

"**Metamorphmagus**? What is that, some kind of a fetish?" which caused Tonks to brake out in uncontrollable laughter.

"No, silly, **Metamorphmagi** are witches or wizards with the ability to change his or her physical appearances at will. Also, people are born with that ability, and not made, that's why they are extremely rare. And that's also why my hair kept changing color, it's because my abilities are affected by my emotional stuff. " she explained.

"Ah, so that's why it kept happening earlier, I see...I see. We will talk more about that particular subject later, okay?"

She just nodded, but her expression turned into worried one, a second later.

"You do not have any problems with it, do you?" she asked.

Naruto, seeing her worried state, reassured her that he was fine with her ability.

"It's just I find very interesting. When you find out more about my life style, you will understand why I want to know so much about your ability to change your appearance." he told her, and gave her a peck on the lips, causing her to smile at him, sentiment which he returned.

Or perhaps he was just good at acting...who knows...

"Now, please, continue." said Uchiha, but before she could even open her mouth, he abruptly cut her off, his mischievous grin on growing on his face.

"Or no, wait! Before you start, add 'Nymphadora Tonks' to my likes, and 'spanking Nymphadora Tonks' to my hobbies."

She sent him a playful glare, and smacked his shoulder.

"Stop being a pervert." she told him, momentarily forgetting about the situation she was in.

"Pervert? You're one to talk, sitting on my lap, completely naked, looking all sexy and delicious." he retorted .

Metamorphmagus looked down at herself, and saw that indeed she was naked.

"Oh yeah, you're right." she said it as if she just realized that particular fact. "Or no, I am not." she added quickly. Also for a moment she wondered just when exactly did he manage to take off her shirt and skirt, without her noticing.

Black haired shinobi only raised an eyebrow at her, asking her a silent question.

"I still have my shoes and socks on." she happily answered.

He looked down at her feet, and then back at her. He made gave a soft 'Ah' in acknowledgment.

"Hey, why are you _not _naked?" she looked at him, only now noticing that he still had half of his uniform on.

Naruto just shrugged.

"I forgot to take it off. Mind helping me in getting rid of it?"

Her answer was a wide grin, and kiss that followed it.

He raised his hands, and she lifted his jumper over his head, and threw it into the pile of clothes, that formed near the desk that they used earlier.

Not wasting any time, Tonks proceeded to unbutton his shirt, revealing his bare chest and torso.

Uchiha helped her take off his shirt, after it was fully unbuttoned, and threw in the same pile that jumper was thrown into.

"Mmmm...you look even more handsome when you're naked."

"Thanks, you're quite beautiful yourself." he shot her an amused look, and slapped her ass, _again._

She yelped, not expecting it.

"Uhh, I just love spanking you!"

"Will you ever stop doing that already? My butt is all red."

"You and I both know that you like it, and it turns you on, so I'm not going to stop. I will spank this sexy, little ass of yours as much as I want."

"Asshole." she mumbled.

Naruto just smirked, and put his mouth next to her ear.

"We will do that later" he whispered to her.

She instantly went tomato – red in color.

"Now get on with your damned introduction, or we will stay as strangers for all eternity at this pace."

"Okay okay, sheesh." she paused for a moment, looking thoughtful.

"Naru..."

"Hmmm?"

"What was I suppose to say, again?"

Naruto stared at her for a minute, before facepalming, hard.

"What? Oh come on, anybody would forget after all that mindblowing sex we had."

"You call that mindblowing? Nym, lemme explain something to you. There are several levels of how good sex can be. Those levels are: 'Horrible', 'Not Bad', 'Good', 'Amazing' and finally 'Mindblowing'. What we had was merely 'Good', though it was pretty close to 'Amazing'. And believe me, if I _really_ tried to give you 'Mindblowing' sex, you wouldn't be conscious right now." Uchiha explain to his new lover.

Tonk raised her eyebrow at him, and looked him curiously.

"How much sex did you have before?" she asked.

"This is my first time." came his instant reply.

"Then how come you know so much about it?" she retorted with another question.

"I read...a lot. And I know my limits." _'It also helps that I have memories of several full grown men'_

She looked at him suspiciously for several seconds, but nodded nonetheless.

"Now, what you gotta tell me are your likes, dislikes, hobbies and goals for future."

She nodded again, in acknowledgment.

"I like playing around with my metamorphic abilities, making friends, and helping people. I also love my parents, even if my fool of a mother named me Nymphadora. And not so long ago, I started to like certain young man, who goes by the name Naruto." she wiggled her eyebrows at the end, making Uchiha chuckle and kiss her.

"I dislike, as you already guessed, my first name, all that stupid stuff related to blood purity bullshit, and my clumsiness. Hobbies? I guess my hobbies are dueling and quidditch. And my goals for future would be to become an Auror, and have a loving family of my own." finished Nymphadora.

"So you wanna be an Auror huh? I guess we can help each other." muttered Naruto, which Tonks heard.

"Help each other? How?" she asked curiously.

"Nevermind that now, I'll explain later. What does matter, is that now we know something about each other, and we are not complete strangers, which makes us friends." he skillfully changed a subject.

"Just friends?" she asked with a frown.

"Well, if you want to us to be something more, namely a couple, we still need to go on a date."

Hearing this, her frown only deepened.

"But don't you worry, I have a perfect date in mind, which we can have, say, in about 15 minutes. So how about it?" he asked her, with his signature smirk, and acting enthusiastic.

"Oh? And where would we have our 'perfect date' in fifteen minutes?" her expression switched back curiosity.

"Why, in Prefects' bathroom of course!" answered blue eyed shinobi, grinning widely.

"But I am not a prefect." she said with a scowl.

"Who said that you needed to be one to enter there. All you need do, is to know a password. Which fortunately for us, I have right here." he tapped his temple, with his index finger.

"And you should stop scowling so much, your face looks much more beautiful when you smile, or even better yet, when you are moaning and screaming in pleasure." he added, while grinning perversely.

"Pervert." she mumbled into his shoulder, as she tried to hide her completely red face.

"Always." he answered loudly, with his grin intact.

Then, without even a warning, he stood up, lifting Tonks along with him, holding her by her ass, and headed toward the door..

She tightened her grip on his neck by reflex, while her legs hung in mid-air, on Naruto's sides.

"What are you doing?" she hissed quietly in his ear, as he opened the door that led into the corridor of the second floor, and poked his head out of the door frame, causing her head to poke out with his own, and looked around the corridor.

"Well, as you see, or feel, I am already hard again. And I don't really fancy waiting 15 whole minutes, till our date starts, so I came up with a brilliant idea." he told her, as slid down the corridor, still carrying his dark eyed lover.

"Oh? And what would that idea be?" she asked, trying hard not to moan as he was walking.

"We will have sex while walking to the prefects' bathroom." he answered her in a tone, that people used to talk about the weather.

"So what do you think?" he whispered into her ear.

"We are having sex while walking through the corridor in Hogwarts, we could get caught! It is craziest thing in the world, somebody would have done, and you ask what do I think?" she almost shouted at him.

"I absolutely love it!" she whispered in a husky voice, second later, and gave his passionate kiss, which lasted for several minutes.

"Don't worry about too much about getting caught, all we need to do is reach the other end of this corridor, where is secret passageway to the fifth floor."

"How do you about it?" she asked, slightly panting. It took her a lot of effort not to moan out loud.

"It's a secret."he whispered back, grinning mischievously from ear to ear.

"I will say this though: I know about _every_ secret passage in this castle."

She only gave him a nod, her eyes slightly wide.

When they almost reached their destination at the end of the corridor, a short moan, which was muffed by Naruto's chest, escaped her.

"You know, even if I said that you don't need to worry too much about getting caught, it would do us good to keep quiet. Who knows when that crazy, old fool Filch will show up. And even worse, if one of the painting spots us." he warned her.

"What's so bad about some painting spotting us?" she asked when he stopped, reached out for a torch that was slightly above her head, grabbed it, and started muttering something under his breathe, that Tonks didn't quite catch.

"Every painting in this castle reports everything it sees, directly to Dumbledore, that's what." he answered her, making a short hissing sound.

And moment later, diagonal slit appeared on the wall, that was behind Nymphadora's back, and it opened like a common double door, revealing a dark passage.

"Well, he we go." he said, and stepped inside, along with Tonks, who was moving her hips up and down against his own. Mere seconds after they were inside, parted wall was back in it's original place, not leaving a trace of somebody being there.

By the time they reached prefects's bathroom, Tonks already came twice, and was on her way to a third climax, while Naruto came only once. He guessed it was because of an adrenaline rush, that she was so sensitive.

They exited the bathroom several hours later, when it was about three in the morning. And judging by the huge, toothy grin on Nym's face, their date went quite well.

He decided to walk with her 'till they reached Hufflepuff common room entry, but Tonks insisted that he walk her only to the kitchen.

"I am really sorry, but non-Hufflepuffs aren't allowed to know how to get into our common room." she told him with an apologetic smile.

"Nah, don't worry about it, it's cool." he shrugged off her attempt to apologize.

"Great, then I'll see you tomorrow, Naru." she told him, visibly excited to spend more time with him, and gave him a hug.

"Yeah, goodnight, Nym." returning the gesture, and kissing her goodnight, for which she had to lower down her head a little, seeing as she was taller than him by few inches.

They parted, two minutes later, and headed for their respective common rooms.

And as he walked down the dungeons, he couldn't help but think about how much of a fool he was, to say that this week went _smoothly_.

_'FUCK NO! This week didn't just go smothly, it was fucking(pun intended) awesome.' _was his final thought, before he entered Slytherin common room.

* * *

><p><strong>Deleted scene<strong>

"And you should stop scowling so much, your face looks much more beautiful when you smile, or even better yet, when you are moaning and screaming in pleasure." he added, while grinning perversely.

"Pervert." she mumbled into his shoulder, as she tried to hide her completely red face.

"Always." he answered loudly, with his grin intact.

But before he say another world, wooden door on his right, was tore down from it's hinges, and flew past him, hitting a wall on Naruto's right.

He jumped from his chair in shock, dropping Tonks on the floor, knocking her out due to her head hitting the floor...hard.

When he looked at the spot, where door was suppose to be, he saw a dark silhouette standing there. Who couldn't really tell who it was because of the dark.

But when the dark figure took several steps forward, and stepped into the moonlight, he clearly saw who it was .

There was no mistake. Standing there, in front of him, his wand out, and his left index finger pointed accusingly at Naruto, was...Severus Snape.

"You..." Professor Snape hissed.

"Me?" asked totally confused Naruto, pointing at himself.

"Yes, you...how dare you? **Crucio!** " yelled out Snape, and watched as young man in front of him, rolled on the floor in agony.

He laughed madly as the light left boy's eyes.

After several more minutes of insane laughter, he managed to take control of his emotions.

Snape turned around, and walked out of the room, his flowing, black robes gliding through the air behind him.

"Nobody...nobody steals my lines..." he whispered into the thin air.

* * *

><p><strong>EEEEEEEEEND OF CHAPTER 4!<strong>

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P.S: if you're name is not here, do not worry, you will have more chances to receive a special 'Thank you' from me, in the next chapter, if you look a nice and positive review. ^_^

P.P.S: "Update soon" is _not_ nice and positive.


	5. Interesting!

**Hellooooooo there guys, how ya doing, are you bored? Don't answer, I already know. Now that i'm here, you're feeling well and entertained! Yeah, I know, i'm awesome!**

**And what a better way to start this beautiful day, than a rant! Or more specifically, THE rant about Naruto FFs.**

**So anyway, couple of days ago, I saw this one guy rant about the same thing, and then I suddenly remembered that I wanted to do it for several moths but never got the chance.**

**So 1st thing that i'm gonna say is: Are you fucking kidding me?**

**Seriously, yesterday, I decided to check out Naruto fanfics for some new ones to read. And you know what I saw? Whole page, the WHOLE MOTHERFUCKING PAGE filled with nothing BUT some gay ass shit about Naruto and Sasuke fucking each other.**

**I like beautiful and sexy women, and some other people like it in the ass, I get it, and I respect that(okay, maybe I don't, I just don't care), and I don't have anything against you people. But please, for the love of all that is holy and Scarlett Johansson, stop spreading around all that gay bullshit. Thank you.**

**2nd) Why do you people write same bullshit all over again? Don't you have any ORIGINAL ideas perhaps? 85% of all Naruto FFs are about the same freaking thing. **

**It's either A)He is the same freaking imbecile that he is in manga(or god forbid, even dumber.), every sentence out of his mouth is some cliché bullshit, and after several chapter, for some idiotic reason he become Hokage to protect his precious people.(This sentence 'Protect my precious people', drives me fucking crazy. Please, kill me if I ever use it in any serious conversation.)**

**B) Some God(or Kami or w/e) gives him superpower, because it saw how cruel Naruto's life was, and wants him protect his precious people...WHAT KIND OF JACKSHIT IS THAT? 1- why in the fucking hell would some idiotic God or w/e give Naruto any power at all? There are millions of people who's life is even worse, and I don't hear about millions of superpowered bitches flying around. 2 – I'm and atheist, enough said. 3- Again with this 'precious people' bullcrap. Seriously, if your whole fucking village hates you, and you suddenly get really powerful, you don't just go and protect them like a knight in shining armor. You kill those fuckers. It's simple, look – Somebody hates you? Kill them. Somebody hates you, but has something that you need? Get that something, and THEN kill him. Somebody worships the ground you walk on, but is useless to you? FUCKING KILL THEM! It's simple as fuck!(If you're not a virgin that is.) And btw, I really REALLY do not like ANY FF that involves Gods conversing with some humans like they're old pals or something.(Though there are some rare ones that are OK.)**

**C) Now I know that there are not many Dark/Evil or w/e Naruto FFs, but from all those 6k+ fanfics, there are like 10 or so good ones. Look, if you started to write Dark Naruto fanfic, do not, and I repeat, DO NOT ever make him go good and act like a pussy. And if he sudden;y gained some dark power, please, do not do this -'I have a dark powers, that I will use to protect my precious people'. To me, that makes no fucking sense. You must be either an idiot, or have some ulterior motive to do it, and as far as I can see, there only one damn motive – to be a complete fucking moron.(Which, as I said, I absolutely hate.)**

**D) Now this is one of the most important things that I wanted to say. I really REALLY FREAKING HATE kind of fanfics that have absolutely no logic behind it. I am the kind of person who does everything according to logic.(And even if something does not sound logical to you, it does to me.) And when I write, I like to explain EVERYTHING, and give some legit reasons for certain actions, so people would see where the logic lies in a story, so it would make sense to them. But when you start a story with something like – 'Naruto has a Byakugan, and he learn Jyuuken with Hyuugas.' it is most certainly NOT logical. You gotta explain the background, show some reasons, and explain why certain people took that actions instead of another.**

**E) Harem stories. Don't even make me go there, it would take me almost whole day to point out all the fucked up things that people write.**

**Aaaaaaaaaand that's it. I mean, I still have A LOT of thing to rant about, but I think that this is enough for today.(I'm gonna rant about 'em in next chapter. And you don't want to read about me ranting about some idiots, say so, and I will stop.)**

**Without further ado, I present to you, NEW CHAPTER OF THOS!**

* * *

><p>"Goddamned" - normal speech.<p>

_'Mice'_ – thoughts.

"**Fucking"** - Demons/Summons and such speech.

_**'In'**_ – Demons/Summons and such thoughts.

"**My"** - Jutsu/Spells, Ninja/Wizard related things.

"_Yard"_ - Parseltongue.

**Chapter 5**

**Things are about to get really interesting.**

Naruto's second week in Hogwarts, was going pretty damn good, if he had to say so himself.

He had the best grades in his year, every professor liked him, and thought of him as young prodigy, and brought him up as an example for other students to follow. And he had a feeling that he was slowly becoming Professor Snape's _most_ favorite student. And to top it all, he had a hot girlfriend, who's mother, he was starting to suspect, named her as she did for a reason.

_'Maybe it runs in the family, to randomly become horny multiple times per day.'_ he thought to himself several times.

It was Thursday, and Naruto was a little excited for today, seeing as they had their first flying lesson this afternoon. He never really tried flying on a broom before, and he wondered on occasions, how it would feel to fly on a broom, plus, he would be getting some physical exercise.

Not that he didn't get enough, mind you. He still did his morning workouts, and as far as he was concerned, moving his hips back and forward for several hours was pretty good workout.

He also visited Ella, couple of times to play tag, or race her.. Old basilisk was overjoyed when she heard that he was ready to spend time with her, as he promised her.

"It's not exactly entertaining to sit in a hole for god knows how long, and now, thanks to you, I will have an opportunity to stretch a little." she told him.

He just shrugged off her multiple 'Thank you, Master Naruto', and told her that he didn't really have anything better to do, so he just decided to spend time with her, but also added that he would try to come more often. He wouldn't admit it out loud, but he got attached to Ella.

_'It's probably because she's a serpent, and not a human. After all, your pet would not betray you for money or women.' _he reasoned.

But back to flying lessons, it was around tree-thirty in the afternoon, and Slytherin first-years were standing outside, near twenty broomsticks, waiting for Gryffindors and their teacher.

Seeing as neither was coming any time soon, Naruto decided to meditate. He flopped down on a grassy surface of the Hogwarts grounds. He settled in the lotus position, and closed his eyes.

He wouldn't even think of meditating in situation like this, but Kyūbi was starting to act up, and if he didn't subdue it with Sharingan every couple of hours, it would be pain in the ass to do so tonight.

His classmates and friends looked at him strangely, but didn't comment on it, though he faintly heard Malfoy snicker and say something along the lines of 'Look at that idiot, falling asleep like that'.

By the end of this day, Draco will be in the hospital for sure, decided Naruto.

Fifteen minutes later, Gryffindors arrived, and five more minutes later, their teacher showed up.

Uchiha opened his eyes, and stood up to looks at his professor.

It was Madam Hooch, if he remembered right. She had a short, gray hair, and yellow eyes like a hawk.

"Well, what are you all waiting for? Everyone stand by a broomsticks. Come on, hurry up" she barked.

Naruto did as he was told, though he didn't really trust this old broomstick, which looked like it would break in two if a toddler stepped on it.

_'Oh well, worst case scenario – it will just break in midair.' _he idly thought to himself.

"Stick your right hand over your broom, and say 'Up'" called out Madam Hooch, and stood at the front.

"UP." he heard everybody shout. He silently shook his head at his fellow first-years.

_'Why do they need to be this loud, it's not like you'll get a better result if you say it louder than anybody else.'_

"Up." commanded Naruto, with even tone. His broom flew in his open palm at once.

Blue eyed shinobi, looked around to see how everybody else was doing. Daphne's and Tracey's brooms were in their hands as well, but only a few other achieved the same result as them.

After everybody managed to get their broomsticks off the ground, Madam Hooch showed them how to mount their brooms without sliding off the end, and walked up and down the rows correcting their grips.

Naruto overheard her telling Malfoy, that he'd been doing it wrong for years.

Young Uchiha, like everybody else in Slytherin house, heard Draco gloating about how he was an excellent flier, and practiced frequently with the broom.

_'Fucking idiot.' _thought Naruto, as he watched their teacher show Malfoy the right way to mount brooms.

"Now, when I blow my whistle, you kcik off from the ground, hard." said Madam Hooch.

"Keep your brooms steady, rise a few feet, and then come straight back down by leaning forward slightly. On my whistle – three – two – "

But before a whistle even touched her lips, somebody from Gryffindors' side kicked off the ground, and rose into the air.

Naruto turned his head the right, to get a better look at who it was. He could see a chubby kid, with nervous and scared expression, sweating like a pig in an oven. Yep, it was that weakling, Neville Longbottom.

_'I'm surrounded by idiots and weakling.' _he sighed quietly.

"Come back, boy!" shouted Madam Hooch, but it seemingly fell on deaf ears to Longbottom.

Poor sap was rising high into the air, while his face became almost as white as Zetsu's.

When he was about twenty feet high above the ground, Naruto saw him gasp and slide sideways off the broom.

WHAM!

With a thud and audible crack, Longbottom hit the ground, while his broomstick was still rising higher into the air, and started o drift lazily toward the forbidden forest and out of sight.

Madam Hooch was bending over Neville, her face as white as his.

"Broken wrist. Come on, boy – it's all right, up you get." he heard her mutter.

She turned to the rest of the class.

"None of you is to move while I take this boy to the hospital wing! You leave those brooms where they are or you''ll be out of Hogwarts before you can say 'Quidditch'. Come on, dear"

Neville, his face soaked in tears, clutching his wrist, hobbled off with Madam Hooch, who had her arm around him.

No sooner were they out of earshot than Malfoy burst into laughter.

"Did you see his face, the great lump?"

The other Slytherins joined in, thought, Naruto stayed quiet. After all, people do not go around laughing at useless trash, so why should he?

"Shut up, Malfoy." snapped Parvati Patil.

"Ohh, sticking up for Longbottom? Never thought you'd like fat little crybabies, Parvati." taunted Pansy Parkinson, girl that Naruto seen several time at the Slytherin common room, hanging around Malfoy.

"Look!" said Malfoy , darting forward and snatching something out of the grass. "It's that stupid thing Longbottom's gran sent him."

Yes, Naruto saw it when it arrived. That thing was called Remembrall. It was pretty useless in Naruto's opinion.

"Give that here, Malfoy." Naruto heard Harry say quietly.

_'Ohh, now that's interesting. Maybe something fun will come out of it after all.'_

"I think i'll leave it somewhere for Longbottom to fin – how about – a tree?" replied Malfoy. And judging by his body language, he was about to mount a broom.

"Malfoy" Naruto finally said and stepped forward, causing everybody to stop, and stare at him, including Draco.

"We wouldn't want you to be seen causing a fight, or flying on a broom, when Madam Hooch clearly said that we shouldn't, now would we? After all, you could loose point for Slytherin. So give that useless thing to Potter, and be done with it." continued Uchiha with friendly smile on his face.

"I'll do whatever I want." was his arrogant answer.

Naruto did not take that well.

He started walking toward Malfoy, who still had his smirk plastered on his face.

"You know, that fool, Longbottom, he know that he is just a useless weakling, and stays out of others' way...unlike you." said Naruto, still slowly walking forward, his friendly smile changing into sadistic one. Though only Malfoy, who was in front of him could see it.

"I am going to tell this only once – know your place, weakling, and don't get into others' way." by this time, Naruto was about a meter away from, now nervous, Draco.

Malfoy took a step back, allowing Crabbe and Goyle to shield him.

"Oh? Hiding behind others' back? How...brave of you, Mr. Malfoy." said Naruto, not stopping in his advance.

When he was right in front of two bodyguards wannabe, Goyle attempted to grab him by his robe, but failed miserably. Naruto caught his hand, twisted it, and with strength nobody knew he possessed, threw him to the left, right into Crabbe, sending them flying several meters, knocking them both out.

Malfoy, seeing that both of his bodyguards were tossed away like a rag-dolls, mounted his broom, and flew up in the air, still holding Remembrall.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Potter following him into the air, with his own broom.

"Well, I warned him not to cause trouble."he said loudly enough, for everybody to hear.

He outstretched his hand back, still following Malfoy with his eyes, causing broom to fly right into his open palm.

And with one quick motion of his arm, he threw his broom, like a spear, in Draco's direction, making it slam right into his gut.

But before Naruto's broom knocked the wind out him, he managed to throw Remembrall high into the air.

Next moment, everybody was watching falling Malfoy, who was holding his stomach in pain.

But before blonde Slytherin could even think of hitting a hard ground, he saw raven haired Uchiha standing right beneath him, his left arm in 'L' shape, and smiling like a loon.

Next thing Malfoy knew, Naruto's biceps and shoulder hit him in already hurting stomach, knocking him out.

Satisfied, Naruto turned around to face the rest of the class, his friendly smile back in it's place.

"And that's why only bad things come out of breaking rules." he said cheerfully, causing some first-years to laugh nervously, and other to just stare at him in shock, wonder, amazement and even fear.

He made his way back to the group of Slytherin students, where Daphne and Tracey were waiting for him, Malfoy still slung over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

"Do you really care _that_ much about house points?" whispered Daphne into his ear, when nobody was listening.

Naruto just looked at her like she was crazy.

"What? Of course not! Who do you think I am? I just wanted a reason to fuck with Malfoy. HAHAHAHAAA!" he whispered back, and then laughed loudly.

"HARRY POTTER!" he heard somebody shout, recognizing it as Professor McGonagall's voice.

He turned around to look at what was going on, only to see several Gryffindors arguing with Professor McGonagall, and several minutes later, Harry Potter following her into the castle, his head bowed down.

_'Oh well, not my problem.'_ Naruto thought, leading other Slytherins into the castle, and to take Malfoy into the hospital. After all, he still needed to maintain image of friendly and caring kid.

_'If I was still in Elemental Nations, and somebody who knows me called me friendly and caring, I would outright laugh at them...or kill them. '_

And with that thought in mind, Naruto along his two companions took off into the castle, followed by the rest of first years.

* * *

><p><strong>= Later – Dinnertime – Great Hall =<strong>

Naruto, as usual was sitting between two of his female, Slytherin friends, making a small talk. He wasn't paying much attention to the people around him, expect few.

And it so happens that one those few people was harry Potter, who was currently having a glare contest with Draco, who surprisingly enough was out of the hospital, and his two bodyguards, Crabbe And Goyle.

_'Should've hit that bitch harder. Though I doubt it would have made much difference, medical magic is pretty fast. Note to self: learn medical magic later. Now what does he want from Potter hmm?' _thought Naruto, as he focused on Potter's and Malfoy's lips.

Second later, a big grin appeared on Naruto's face, as if he just won in a lottery.

_'Wizard's duel eh? This could be a perfect chance to befriend Potter. Gotta work fast!' _thought Naruto, quickly making his way toward the Gryffindor table.

He reached it just in time to hear Weasley saying "I'm his second, who's yours?"

Not wasting a second, he sneaked up behind Malfoy, and put his hands on Draco's shoulders.

"I'll be his second, won't I, Draco?" asked Uchiha, smiling friendly at the group.

"S-Sure, you can be my second." was Draco's nervous reply.

"Great, I'll see you guys later" said Naruto, and took off back to the Slytherin table.

* * *

><p><strong>= That night – near midnight =<strong>

"Don't go. I'm gonna miss you so bad." whispered putting Tonks, giving Naruto couple of pecks on the lips.

"Now, don't be like that. I promise that I will spend more time with you, after I settle this thing with those brats."

"Do you really mean it?"

"Absolutely." answered Naruto, giving Nymphadora a long, deep kiss.

"I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" said Uchiha.

Getting a nod from female metamorphmagus, he started moving toward the third floor, leaving Tonk alone.

When he reached his destination, he entered the trophy room. The crystal trophy cases glimmered where the moonlight caught them. Cups, shields, plates, and statues winked silver and gold in the darkness.

Four pair of eyes stared at him as he stepped inside. He wasn't expecting two others to be there as well, but maybe it was for the best.

"How ya doin'?" casually asked Naruto.

"Where's Malfoy?" fired back Ron, not even acknowledging Uchiha's question.

"What? Don't tell me you actually thought that he was coming?"

"B-But he said that he would come, and you volunteered to be his second, and -" stuttered out red headed Gryffindor.

"And what if I said that I was sparkling unicorn, traveling through the space, and shitting rainbows? Whatever reason would you have not to believe me huh?"

"He tricked us! And we fell for it!" exlaimed Harry.

"Wait, why did you volunteer to be Malfoy's second if you knew he wasn't going to show up?" asked Hermione, while at the same time trying to shake off Neville, who was clinging on to her, shivering like crazy.

"To keep you lot out of trouble of course. You really thought that I would help out Malfoy? Please, I hate that brat." snarled raven haired shinobi.

Naruto was about to tell them to get back to Gryffindor tower, when they all hears noise in the next room, which made first year Gryffindor jump.

"Sniff around, my sweet, they might be lurking in a corner." they all heard Filch speak to Mrs. Norris.

"This way." whispered Naruto, making four Gryffindors follow him, petrified, down a long gallery of suits of armor. They could hear Filch getting nearer. Neville suddenly let out a frightened squeak and broke into a run he tripped, grabbed Ron around the waist, and the pair of them toppled right into a suit of armor.

The clanging and crashing were enough to wake the whole castle.

"RUN" Harry yelled, and the five of them sprinted down the gallery, not looking back to see whether Filch was following - they swung around the doorpost and galloped down one corridor then another, Harry in the lead, Gryffindors students without any idea where they were or where they were going, and all the while Naruto cursing his luck for being stuck with these stupid brats - they ripped through a tapestry and found themselves in a hidden passageway, hurtled along it and came out near their Charms classroom, which they knew was miles from the trophy room.

"I think we've lost him," Harry panted, leaning against the cold wall and wiping his forehead. Neville was bent double, wheezing and spluttering.

"Next time, don't yell, and let me take the lead, I know castle better than you four." Uchiha told them, not looking even winded in a bit. "Now, let's go."

It wasn't going to be that simple. They hadn't gone more than a dozen paces when a doorknob rattled and something came shooting out of a classroom in front of them.

It was Peeves. He caught sight of them and gave a squeal of delight.

"Shut up, Peeves - please - you'll get us thrown out." hissed Ron.

Peeves cackled.

"Wandering around at midnight, Ickle Firsties? Tut, tut, tut. Naughty, naughty, you'll get caughty."

"Peeves, leave!" commanded Naruto.

This only set off Peeves.

"STUDENTS OUT OF BED!" Peeves bellowed, "STUDENTS OUT OF BED DOWN THE CHARMS CORRIDOR!"

Uchiha was about to tell his companions to stay calm, and follow him, but unfortunately he didn't get the chance to do it, as four first years dashed forward to the end of the corridor where they slammed into a door, which was locked.

"This is it!" Ron moaned, as they pushed helplessly at the door, "We're done for! This is the end!"

They could hear footsteps, Filch running as fast as he could toward Peeves's shouts.

"Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wand, that Potter took out a while ago, tapped the lock, and whispered, "Alohomora!"

The lock clicked and the door swung open - they piled through it, shut it quickly, and pressed their ears against it, listening.

All the while, Naruto was standing behind them, observing.

"Which way did they go, Peeves?" they heard Filch was saying. "Quick, tell me."

"Say 'please.'"

"Don't mess with me, Peeves, now where did they go ?"

"Shan't say nothing if you don't say please," said Peeves in his annoying singsong voice.

"All right - please."

"NOTHING! Ha haaa! Told you I wouldn't say nothing if you didn't say please! Ha ha! Haaaaaa!" And they heard the sound of Peeves whooshing away and Filch cursing in rage.

"He thinks this door is locked," Harry whispered. "I think we'll be okay - get off, Neville!" For Neville had been tugging on the sleeve of Harry's bathrobe for the last minute. "What ?"

_'Oh, this is just hilarious. I can't wait to see look on their faces when they realize where exactly they are.' _thought Naruto, watching as Harry turned around, along with Hermione and Ron, and as they became white as sheet of paper.

There, behind all five of them, was a monstrous dog, a dog that filled the whole space between ceiling and floor. It had three heads. Three pairs of rolling, mad eyes; three noses, twitching and quivering in their direction; three drooling mouths, saliva hanging in slippery ropes from yellowish fangs.

It was standing quite still, all six eyes staring at them.

_'It's probably just surprised to see us, or it would certainly attack us.' _thought Uchiha, not taking his eyes of the dog.

Then three headed dog started growling quite menacingly at them,

_'Ah, there it is.'_

Naruto prepared to defend himself, but out of the corner of his eye he saw Potter's hand inching toward the doorknob.

_'Oh well, I'll come back later. After all, if you're guarding something, it must be really important.' _ were thoughts of Uchiha, as he looked straight into dog's middle head's eyes, and all the while suppressing the urge to smile maniacly.

And as if said dog could hear his thoughts, it started growling at him even louder.

He started taking a small steps backward, until his back was pressed into four Gryffindors, and seconds later they all fell on their backs, courtesy of Harry opening the door, and then slamming it shut.

When Naruto got up, he saw Gryffindors running toward their house tower as if demons were chasing them, and not even looking back.

_'Brats forgot about me, huh? That's good. And what do you know, not only did I befriend Potter, but I even found something interesting.' _thought blue eyed shinobi, vanishing into the thin air, leaving only darkness of the corridor behind.

* * *

><p><strong>= Deleted scene =<strong>

It was around midnight, and Filch, along with Mrs. Norris were patrolling the corridors of Hogwarts, as they usually did every night.

Filch heard his cat meowing, so he followed the sound. He came upon Mrs. Norris meowing at fice 7th year Slytherin students.

"Well well, what do we have here? Students wandering around after curfew? Detention, all of you!" snarled Filch.

Slytherin students looked at each other, took out their wands, and pointed them at Filch.

"I don't think so. You're just a squib, what can you do? We're just going to Obliviate you, and you won't even remember that you saw us." said one of the Slytherin students.

Filch's lips curled into a nasty grin.

"Mrs. Norris, roundhouse kick them!"

"MEOOOOOW!"

BOOM!

POOM!

THUD! THUD!

POW!

THUD!

WHAM!

BAM!

THUD THUD!

And as Filch looked down on five unconscious students, he couldn't help but remember the day when he got Mrs. Norris.

_**= Flashback =**_

_Filch was sitting on a bench, crying his eyes out. Other kids didn't want to play with him, but what could he do? It wasn't his fault that he was a squib!_

_He didn't notice a man approaching him, until man's shadow fell on his little body._

"_Hey there, buddy, why are you crying?" he heard the man say._

_He looked up, but couldn't see stranger's face because of the sunlight._

"_Nobody wants to play with me, and I don't have any friends." _

_Man didn't say anything for a few seconds, only reaching for his backpack, with his right hand, and bringing his half-closed hand near Filch._

_When he opened his hand, Filch saw a little bundle of fur, that turned out to be a little kitten._

"_Here you go, she will be your friend, and she will play with you." Stranger told Filch._

_Filch took little cat into his arms, and stroked it's fur, making kitten meowl in approval._

_A happy smile appeared on kid's face as he looked down at his new friend._

"_Thank you." Filch said quietly, but loud enough for the man to hear._

"_You're welcome, kid." replied stranger, and started walking away._

"_Wait, Mister, what is your name?" Filch called out to the stranger._

"_It's Chuck Norris, kid." answered the man, giving Filch a thumb up._

_Filch looked down at the kitten in his arms, as it stared back at him._

"_Do you want to be called Mrs. Norris?" asked kid, receiving another sound of approval from the cat, which made him smile even brighter._

_**= Flashback – end =**_

Filch knelt down, and picked up Mrs. Norris, and started walking through the corridors, all the while stroking her fur.

"Let's go, my sweet, we still have students to catch."

* * *

><p><strong>AAAAAAAAAAND CUT!<strong>

**First of all, I want to apologize for the long wait. This chapter was pretty tough for me to write. Don't ask why, it's just my stupid thing.**

**Now here's a little thing that has been bothering me for a long time, and I can finally get it out.**

**There were a couple of reviews that implied(or outright said it) that my background on this story is bullshit.**

"**to me it feels like you mixed time lines to much cause they never talked of bijuu in harry potter. so in my eys this story is a mess sorry but i can't read what is as confusing as a paradox" -PurplePulsar**

**Are you fucking stupid or what? Read the story, do not just run through it. It says pretty clearly what happened. And if you still don't get it, I will explain again.**

**Salazar traveled to Japan, sealed off a small part of Japan before battling the beast(which was later dubbed as Juubi), sealed it inside himself, and later divided it into nine pieces, which were dubbed as Bijuu. **

**So how the fuck would anybody outside Elemental Nations, would know about Bijuus, they were sealed off from the outside world?**

**And one more interesting fact – somebody, in reviews, called me a Pedobear. (Truthfully, I wasn't expecting that.)**

**Anywhore, thanks for your nice reviews, and for pointing out my errors(i'm serious), I appreciate it.**

* * *

><p><strong>And here are the awesome people, who left equally awesome reviews. Love you guys.(No Homo)<strong>

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* * *

><p><strong>There! And once again, sorry for the long again. And as always, tell me what you think, tell me if you liked it, and tell me if you hated it. Also, if you have any questions regarding the story, leave a review or PM me, and I will answer them. (If I did not answer, it means that I can't reveal that particular information just yet.)<strong>

**P.S: I know this chapter sucked ass, but I promise that there will be A LOT of action later on.**

**P.S #2: I finally got an idea for Naruto's signature move! Yay! It's called ESD.(Don't try to search for it, I invented it myself.)**

**P.S #3: I need your opinion on something! So I put up a poll! Check it out, and vote it on my profile page. And in case you're too lazy(like me) to go to my prof. Page, here's the poll: **

_**Do you want Itachi or Sasuke to be female?**_

_**Only Itachi **_

_**Only Sasuke **_

_**Both **_

_**Neither **_

**There!**

**SPOILERSSS!1**

**P.S #4: Did you see Madara in latest chapters of manga? Man, I knew there was a reason that I love that sharingan eyed bastard! I mean come on, how much more bad-ass can Madara get? Tell me what you think about it!**

**Anyway, sorry for the long AN!**

**See you later guys, bye!**


	6. Matter of trolls and friends

"Goddamned" - normal speech.

_'Mice'_ – thoughts.

"**Fucking"** - Demons/Summons and such speech.

_**'In'**_ – Demons/Summons and such thoughts.

"**My"** - Jutsu/Spells, Ninja/Wizard related things.

"_Yard"_ - Parseltongue.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Previously on THOS<strong>_

_Naruto openly showed hostility toward Malfoy, and reason it saying that he broke the school rules, thus securing his image as model student. Later on, Naruto, in hopes of gaining Harry Potter's trust and friendship, decided help him out after Malfoy set a trap. And of course he succeeded, but he gained so much more than he was hoping for – a very interesting piece of information._

* * *

><p><strong>Matter of trolls and friends!<strong>

Next morning, when Naruto entered the Great Hall, he quickly scanned his surroundings, paying special attention to the four Gryffindor that he had a little adventure with, last night. He didn't notice anything different about them, expect them being a little pale, but he could work with that. Though he did notice that the whole time that he was in the Great Hall, Malfoy could only generate one particular emotion – shock.

He slowly made his way toward the Gryffindor table, but just as he was about to greet Harry and Ron, owls flooded the Great Hall. Everyone's attention was caught at once by a long, thin package carried by six large screech owls, and even Naruto had to admit that he was a little interested in it. Though he became even more interested in it after it was dropped in front of the one Harry Potter, followed by a letter.

"Good morning you two, how are you?" asked Naruto, standing behind Ron and Harry.

They both jumped a little, and turned around on their chair to face Naruto.

"Bloody hell! You almost gave me a heart attack! Don't sneak up on us again." red head yelled out in shock, while Harry gave a nod of agreement.

"Sorry guys, didn't mean to scare you." replied Uchiha, giving them apologetic smile.

_'If I really wanted to sneak up on you, you both idiots would have been long dead' _

Blissfully unaware of Naruto's thoughts, Ron spoke up again.

"What are you even doing here? Aren't you one those snakes?" pointing with his index finger toward the Slytherin table.

Blue eyed shinobi just eyed him for a minute, before smirking.

"I applaud you great skills in observation, Weasley. Yes, I'm 'one those snakes' as you call it. But sadly, I still do not see your point. Oh, and pointing at people is rude, you might wanna work on your manners."

Ron's entire face turned red from anger, and he was about to retort, when Harry cut him off.

"Sorry, Ron just doesn't like Slytherin much. Did you need something?"

"I just came to check if you were all alright after last nigh. And also I wanted to ask what you think about trapdoor under that dog." said Naruto, whispering last part.

"You saw that?"

"Of course I did. What? You didn't?" asked Uchiha with raised eyebrow.

"Well, no. It was actually Hermione who did."answered Harry.

"We actually have some ideas about what that dog might be guarding." continued Potter.

"Oh? Do tell." said Naruto, leaning closer.

After a brief explanation about small package, that Harry saw in Gringotts, Naruto could barely contain his glee.

_'Finally something interesting in this shithole! Now only question is – would that thing be useful to me, or is it just some random expensive jewelry.'_

"I see, that's interesting. I wonder what could it be...it must be something important, huh?" said Naruto.

"Yeah, we want to know that too. Maybe Hagrid knows what it is, but we're not sure." replied Harry, while Ron just nodded, still mad.

"Oh well, it's not important right now. By the way, what's that you got there?" asked Uchiha, gesturing toward the package that owls dropped.

Harry looked at the package, then at Ron, and finally back at Naruto, and leaned closer to him.

"That's a broomstick, Nimbus Two Thousand." whispered Boy-Who-Lived excitedly.

Naruto's eyebrow rose in curiosity.

"I thought that first years weren't allowed to have a broomstick."

"I got permission from Professor McGonagall, because I will joining Gryffindor Quiditch team this year." said Harry in hushed whisper, and seconds later he realized just what he said.

"But please keep it a secret, I don't want anybody to know."

Naruto smiled and nodded.

"Where's Hermione? I thought that you guys were friends with her." asked Naruto.

"She refuses to speak with us. But we're not complaining, she's just a bossy know-it-all, who would to be friends with her anyway?" snorted Ron.

_'Now, isn't this just perfect, heh.' _thought Naruto, smiling inwardly.

"Okay well, I still need to go check on Hermione and Neville to make sure that they are okay. I will make sure to watch you play, Harry. And try not get into any more troubles." said Naruto, as he started making his way to the Slytherin table, while Harry and Ron went to leave the hall.

But just as they were about to exit the Great Hall, Naruto heard Ron say to Harry.

"I don't trust those snakes, they are all evil."

Uchiha just grinned widely.

_'Stupid brat, he's digging his own grave.'_

* * *

><p><strong>= Later that day – Library =<strong>

Hermione sat in the Library, as she usually did, reading some large book, when she heard somebody call her name. She turned around in her wooden chair, only to come face to face with smiling Naruto.

Naruto guessed that Granger had a shy nature, so it came as no surprise when her face reddened, and she tried to make a little more distance between them.

"Hey there, how are you?"

"I'm f-fine, thank you. What are you doing here?" answered Hermione, still a little red from being in such close proximity with handsome first year Slytherin.

"I came to check on you. I was worried, after all you run off so fast that I didn't even get the chance to escort you four to your common room." said Naruto, casually sitting next to her.

"I'm fine, thank you for your concern." she mumbled, and buried her head into the book that she was holding.

"Oh well, that's good. Well, I'm off then. Make sure to study hard, you do pretty good in classes from what I hear." said Naruto, walking off.

"Still not as good as you." she whispered quietly.

Uchiha still heard her though, and froze for a second, almost missing a step.

_'She's an intelligent girl, so she might be useful. Okay, it's decided then. And if she loses her use to me, I can just kill her. Simple as that.' _

He made complete 180 degree turn, made his way back to bushy haired Gryffindor, and sat back in the chair next her.

"Hey, stop that depressing train of thoughts, will ya? I come from a magical family, so naturally I would be more familiar with magic. But you, on the other hard, are muggleborn, and have very little experience with magic, but you still manage to do better than anyone else in our year. So don't give up, and soon you'll be ten time better than me." Naruto told her, giving her an encouraging smile.

Hermione was looking at him as if he just said that she won in a lottery. Her face brightened up, and her eyes were sparkling.

"Okay!" proclaimed Hermione, nodding her bushy haired head furiously.

"That's the spirit! Now I really must be going, I still stuff to do. So see you." replied Naruto as he stood up and started walking toward the Library exit.

"Wait, Naruto."

"Hmm?"

"Thank you!"

Naruto threw her a charming smile over his shoulder, and started waving her goodbye.

"No problem, that's what friends are for" he said, leaving a very happy first year Gryffindor behind.

* * *

><p><strong>= October 31st – Halloween =<strong>

It has been already two months since Naruto arrival to Hogwarts, and he could wholeheartedly say that these amazing two months were...boring as hell!

If it wasn't for his new 'girlfriend', poor Uchiha would have gone crazy from all the fuck-around-and-do-nothing business.

Though even Naruto couldn't deny that last couple of months were productive.

Everyday he left couple hundreds of clones in Chamber of Secrets – or as Naruto liked to call it 'Big Ass Hideout' – and tasked them with practicing magic that he just learned or already knew. And of course he couldn't but spare some of his time to the aged basilisk, after all there weren't many people who he could speak as freely as he did with her.

This Halloween evening was no exception, he had his clones exercising in magic while he did his usual stuff, namely...

"YES YES! HARDER! FASTER! I AM ALMOST THERE!"

"Stop screaming like that or I'm gonna cum too!"

"THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WANT!"

"Ugh..."

"AAAAH!"

All that was heard afterward was the sound of panting.

Naruto and Nymphadora were currently in one of the unused classrooms, doing what they usually did when they were alone.

Black haired Uchiha was currently sitting in one of the old chairs that was in the classroom that they were using, while Tonks sat in his lap, Naruto's member deep inside of her. And there were both naked...and sweaty...and covered in each other juices. Naruto didn't mind it one bit though.

"You're such a bitch, you know that?"

"You know you like it." she shot back with a smirk on her face, and gave him a little peck on the lips.

"Damn right, I do." he said, mimicking her action.

"Hey..." she started.

"Hmmm?"

"Don't you wannna go to the Great Hall, and see all those new decorations that professors made?"

"Nah, I can see it next year, but won't be able to see you, so I rather spend some time with you here."

"Really?"

He answer was a curt nod, which earned his a good make out session.

Though after she started moving her hips, he knew that she wanted something more than a simple make out session. Who he was to deny woman's wish?

Alas, it was not to be.

Naruto heard sound of heavy footsteps and rumbling in the corridor, which made him stop all together.

He broke the lip lock, and put his hands on her sides, to stop her from moving.

"Nym, stop it." he whispered in her ear.

"What? Why?" she whined.

"Because there's something outside, and it's big."

This made her stop, and second later her eyes widened in surprise when she heard what her 'boyfriend' was talking about.

"Babe, get dressed, clean up, and let's get outta here."

Hearing seriousness, that she never have heard before, in Naruto's voice, Tonks did as she was told, and followed Uchiha, who was opening the only door in the room.

Naruto pushed door open, and was about step outside, but abruptly stopped, which in return caused Nymphadora to stop as well.

She was about ask why he refused to move, but that train of thoughts ended when she looked toward the door.

There, right outside the door, was standing a huge creature, looking directly at them.

It was a horrible sight. Twelve feet tall, its skin was a dull, granite gray, its great lumpy body like a boulder with its small bald head perched on top like a coconut. It had short legs thick as tree trunks with flat, horny feet. The smell coming from it was incredible. It was holding a huge wooden club, which dragged along the floor because its arms were so long.

"Babe..." started Naruto, not taking his eyes off of the huge creature.

"Y-Yes?"

"...the fuck is that thing?"

"I-It's a T-Troll." Tonks stuttered out.

"Troll, huh?" he mumbled.

"You know, buddy, you smell like shit." he continued, smirking at the troll.

Almost as if Troll could understand him, he snarled, and swung his giant club at Naruto, in a horizontal sweep.

Tonks yelled for Uchiha to get out of the way, but was ignored by the said shinobi.

_'Finally I get to kill something! But I better do it quick, or people will see me.'_ he thought, sparing Nym a quick glance out of corner of his eye.

_'Guess I'll have to reveal something about myself to her. Oh well, it was bound to happen sooner or later.'_

He looked up at Troll, and wide, toothy grin appeared on his face.

Naruto lazily raised his left arm, his palm open and facing an incoming attack.

Second later there was soft 'thunk', and Uchiha could be seen holding a gigantic wooden club with his left hand, whilde huge Troll was struggling to free his weapon from the grasps of this little human that he decided to attack.

"So weak..."

It was the only thing that blue eyed Slytherin said, before there was a loud 'BANG', followed by the sound of Troll's headless body hitting the floor, and a nasty sound of his head's insides spraying on the wall.

All the while Tonks stood behind Naruto, wide eyed, her mouth hanging open, not quite managing to comprehend the situation that she found herself in.

One moment she was yelling for her boyfriend, fearing that he was killed by the huge creature, next said creature was lying on the floor, dead, and walls all around her, covered in it's blood, while her supposedly dead boyfriend stood there tall and proud, with his hand outstretched, holding a big, smoking gun.

"W-Wha...How..." was the only sound that she managed to make despite so many questions running through her mind.

"Don't worry about it. Just be cool, and play along, I'll explain everything later." he told her, interrupting whatever she was about to ask him.

Moment later, Professor McGonagall came rushing toward them, closely followed, with Quirrell bringing up the rear. Quirrell took one look at the troll, let out a faint whimper, and leaned on the wall, clutching his heart.

By the look of it, McGonall was pretty angry, if her red face was any indicator.

"What were you thinking of?"she said, her fury letting itself knows. "You're lucky you weren't killed. Why aren't you in your dormitory?"

Snape gave Naruto a swift, piercing look. Uchiha could easily guess that his head of the house was not happy with him being here.

"Please calm down Professor McGonagall. It was not in our intensions to confront a troll, if that is what you are implying. We did not know that there was a troll wandering freely in the castle." answered Naruto as calmly as he could.

While to professors he looked calm and respectful, he was having a hard time trying not to blow bitch's head for yelling at him.

"But why are you here?" asked female Professor of the group, albeit a little more calmly than before.

"We were exercising." was Naruto's short answer.

"And what exactly were those exercises?" asked Snape, giving them both a cold look.

"Tonks" Uchiha gestured to the shaken metamorphmagus. "aims to become an auror after she graduates. And even though her magical knowledge is enough, her physical side is lacking. So we decided to help each other out. I would help her become physically prepared to become an auror, and she would help me out with some spells that I was having trouble with at the time. And as you can see, we are still a little winded from the exercises that we did." he finished, pointing toward himselfs and Nymphadora, while Tonks only nodded in confirmation, not trusting her voice quite yet.

And indeed, when Professors took a good look at them, they noticed that their clothes were ruffed up, and they were both sweaty, and Tonks was a little out of breath. Though Snape noticed several red spots on Nymphadora's neck and collar bone, but did't comment on it.

"That is...acceptable explanation." said Snape, in his silky voice.

"And what of the troll? What happened to him?" asked Professor McGonagall.

"I killed it." was Naruto's simple answer.

"You did, ? But how? First years shouldn't know any destructive spells." asked shocked Professor.

"Indeed, I did. With a **Bombarda** to the head. As for you last claim, I fear that It does not apply to me."

"Please elaborate, Mister Uchiha." said McGonagall, even more shocked that first year student would know such a destructive spell, and use it to such a high degree.

"When I lived in Japan, our house was located in the area with a lot of dangerous creatures. So my father decided to teach to some spells, in hopes of keeping me safe. And I'm very thankful for that, for if I did not know how to defend myself, I would be currently...dead. Is that a satisfactory answer, Professor McGonagall?"

Several seconds after his explanation, which Professors took to proceed what was just said, McGonagall gave curt nod.

"It is, Mister Uchiha. You may go."

Naruto grabbed Tonks' hand, and led her down the corridor, but before they could leave the visual field of three professors, Snape's voice stopped them.

"Uchiha" barked Snape.

"Yes, Professor Snape?" answered Naruto, turning around, only to find Severus several feet in front of himself.

"50 points for defeating a troll, and another 50 for defending your fellow student."

Naruto's vision picked up a small twitch of man's lips, as he gave him points.

"Thank you, Professor."

"Oh, and Uchiha..."

"Yes?" asked Naruto curiously.

"Try not to get caught...exercising with Miss Tonks." Snape told him, giving another pointed look.

"Thank you for your advice, Professor, but I assure you that I will not." replied Naruto respectfully.

Giving him a nod, head of the Slytherin dismissed them.

After several minutes of walking toward the entrance to the Hufflepuff common room, female metamorphmagus suddenly grabbed him by his shoulders and ushered him inside one of the unused classrooms.

"WHAT THE FUCK THAT? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? WE COULD HAVE DIED, WE COULD HAVE – " her rant was cut short when Naruto grabbed her face, and squeezed it, making her unable to utter another word.

"Stop yelling at me, Nymphadora! I am not some child you can yell at. I told you that I would explain, and that means that you must shut up and wait for me to explain." he snapped at her.

She slowly nodded her head, almost afraid, feeling like a kid being scolded by her parents.

He let go of her, and sat on some old desk, and waved his hand in 'come here' gesture.

She made her way toward the desk, that Naruto was sitting on, albeit almost hesitantly, and sat beside him.

"Are you afraid of me?" he asked casually, and Tonks almost detected hint of amusement in his voice.

Her breathe hitched, and she stared at the raven haired shinobi, trying to collect her thoughts.

"No." she proclaimed, putting as much conviction as she could muster in that one word.

He looked her over for a moment before he smirked, and second later started chuckling.

"What's so funny?" her face was red, was it from embarrassment or anger, he didn't know.

"You just looked so cute when you tried to be all serious and shit, I just couldn't help it. Hahaha!" he answered falling into another fit of laughter.

He eventually calmed down enough to hold a normal conversation.

"You know, it's good that you're not afraid."

"Any reason for you to say that? Aside from obvious ones of course."

"I never really told you this, but I don't like weak and easy scared women, I like them strong and with attitude. And just so you know, if you were one of those Barbie wannabes, I wouldn't have even spared you a single glance."

"Really?" she asked curiously.

"Yep." he answered, chuckling for a few seconds.

"So now that we cleared that issue out, you can ask anything you want, and I promise that I will answer honestly."

"Why do you have a gun?" she blurted out.

"Oh? You know what a gun is? Hmm, guess I shouldn't be surprised, your father is a muggle after all. And answer to your question is simple – I have 'em because I love 'em."

"That's not what I meant, I meant to ask why do you – wait, guns as in several of them?"

"Uhu."

"..."

"..."

"How many?" she asked hesitantly.

"Currently I only have six pistols, though I do plan on getting more later on." he put his hands behind his head, and leaned back to lay on the desk that they were sitting on.

"Have you ever...killed anybody beside that troll?" she asked, hovering over him, her hands and legs on his sides.

"Yup, sure did." he answered with a carefree tone.

"But why?"

"Just a job, nothing personal."

"A job? You mean to tell me that you kill people for money?" she said, almost screaming.

"A-ha, sure do." he answered, giving her a grin."

"Do you really want money so much, that you would kill somebody for it?"

"Well, dying for hunger didn't sound so good to me at the time, and neither did searching for rotten food in trashcans." he answered again with a shrug of his shoulders , causing her eyes to widen.

"But what about your father and – "

"A lie." he cut her off.

"A lie?" she repeated, completely shocked at what she just heard.

"Yeah. I own a flat in London, that I bought with fake documents, and where I live alone. But you know, I've been alone as long as I can remember, so it doesn't really bother me that much." he said a little more quietly, averting his eyes to look on the side, away from Nymphaora's eyes.

_'And there goes being honest...oh well, who cares? Sure as hell not me! Hahaha!' _were Naruto's thoughts, while he tried to keep a semi-sad face.

Tonks on the other hand was torn. On one hand, she was really uncomfortable with whole killing business, but on the other hand, she understood why he did it, and she couldn't really blame him.

And in the end, her attachment to the raven haired Slytherin won out.

She gently grabbed hold of his head, and turned it to look him in the eyes, then leaned down and gave a tender kiss.

When she pulled away, she slumped down on his chest, and hugged him.

"You're not alone, you have me." she mumble, clutching his clothes.

"I'm glad." he said in a soft voice.

_'Damn, I should get the Oscar for this. Maybe I'll even give movie a try, preferably one with sex scene in it.' _

His thoughts were interrupted by the female metamorphmagus, clinging to his chest.

"You know, if several moths ago somebody told me that I would have a boyfriend, who is six years younger than me, and not to mention, a killer – "

"Mercenary." he corrected.

"– a mercenary, I would've laughed at them, and asked what they were smoking." she laughed to herself.

"You forgot sexy, awesome and very good in bed!" he said, giving a smirk.

"Oh? And how do you know 'very good in bed'? Hmm, mister?" asked, mimicking his facial expression, and poking him playfully in the chest.

"I don't hear you complaining, Miss 'Oh my god, more more' " he shot back, trying to pronounce her new nickname with some sort of girlish voice.

Hearing his teasing, she turned completely red, along with her hair and eyes, though she couldn't help but give a wide smile.

"You perv." she slapped his shoulder softly, causing him to laugh at her.

"You know you love it."

"Can't say that I don't"

They lay on the desk, relaxing several minutes. Naruto just casually laying, while Nymphadora snuggle to his chest.

After several more minutes of silence, Tonks decided to speak up.

"Say, Naru..."

"Yeah? What is it, babe?"

"Did you come up with that lie on the spot?" she asked curiously.

"Well, kinda. I came up with it white killing a troll." he told her.

"Wow..."

"Yeah..."

And they again descended into the silence.

_'Thanks god she forgot about me stopping that_ _damned club with my bare hand'_ he almost breathed a sigh of relief.

"Hey Naruto."

"Hmm?"

"How did you manage to stop that giant club with you hand?"

_'God dammit!' _He almost groaned.

Yep, this was going to be a loooong night.

* * *

><p><strong>= Next Morning – Great Hall = <strong>

Students everywhere were discussing events of previous evening, so it was pretty loud when Naruto entered, after finishing one his insane physical work outs.

When he sat at the Slytherin table, in his usual place between Tracey and Daphne, his house mates around him started to whisper and point in his direction.

He, of course knew what it was all about. Somehow, that little piece of information about him killing a troll, leaked out. Probably somebody overheard Professors talking, or maybe head boy learned the reason behind addition 100 points in Slytherin bar, and told everybody. Either way he did not really care.

He looked around one more time, and saw that not only people from his house, but from all around the Great Hall were talking about him.

He released a heavy sigh, and started eating his breakfast.

Last night he managed slip past the students that were in Slytherin common room, not wanting to deal with any useless questions. But it seemed that he didn't really have a choice, so he steeled himself for incoming annoying questions of his house mates.

After several minutes of clearing the matter out, and actively trying not to kill any annoying brat, he stood up, and headed toward the exit.

When he was almost out of the Great Hall, he saw Harry, along with Ron, going in the same direction.

_'Perfect timing.'_

"Hey Harry, can you come over here for a second?" he called out to the Gryffindor first year.

Boy-Who-Lived looked in the direction from which he heard somebody call him, only to see raven haired Slytherin waving for him to come over. Without second thought, he started making his way toward his Slytherin friend, Ron follow not far behind.

"Weasley, did I say that you could come?" he asked rather harshly.

Ron was about to reply, when Harry cut him off.

"It's okay Ron, I'll be back in a minute."

Getting a silent nod from his red haired friend, he moved toward the secluded spot whe Naruto was standing.

"Yes Naruto, did you want to talk about something?" asked Harry, curious as to why he was pulled over.

"As a matter of fact, I do. And subject of our discussion is standing several feet behind you."

"Ron? What about him?"

"Harry, you are my friend, so I don't want anything bad to happen to you. And that is exactly why I want you to reconsider your friendship with Ron." he said, while Harry's eyes widened.

"What? Why? What's wrong with Ron?" asked Potter heir.

"Many thing. Do you know how long Hermione cried yesterday because of him?"

"B-But that – "

"But nothing, Harry. You have to realize that Ron Weasley is a very jealous, lazy, shortsighted, unintelligent and rude person. And eventually, he will drag you down to his level. Do you remember when Ron told you that all Slytherin were evil and dark?"

Harry silently nodded, realizing that what Naruto was saying was probably true.

"Do I look evil and dark to you, Harry? Or as a matter of fact, did any other Slytherin do something evil, dark or mean without any reason whatsoever? Well, except Malfoy and his little gang, he's just an asshole."

Harry shook his head in negative motion for every question, and even snickered a little at the end.

"Listen, I'm not telling you to stop being friends with Ron right away. Just think about what I said, okay?"

Again, Harry only nodded in confirmation, and started walking off, but was stopped by Naruto's voice.

"Oh and Harry, go to the library later on, Hermione will probably be there, she always is. She really needs more friends than just me. And I'm sure that if you ask nicely, she will help you with your studies. But don't bring Weasley with you, okay?" said Naruto, and stared making his way to his next class.

Though before two first year Gryffindors disappeared from his sight, his noticed out of the corner of his eye, that Harry was keeping a little more distance than usual with red head.

_' Heh, naive brats, so easy to manipulate. Hahaha' _

* * *

><p><strong>And that's it for this chapter! <strong>

**I really wanted to finish First Year with this chapter, but then I got lazy, and decided that I would slit it into two chapters.**

**And don't be mad at for so little action. Character interaction is very important part of the story at this stage.**

**Btw, if some of you think that I haven't updated my story for so long because of some serious matter, well...congratulation...you're completely wrong! **

**I was just being a lazy asshole, and couldn't force myself to write. Oh, and I also started watching One Piece! Isn't it great?**

**So anyway, here's the bonus that I hope you will like.**

* * *

><p><em>=<strong>Ask Naruto =<strong>_

**Rinoti: EVERYBODY, WELCOME TO THE VERY FIRST EPISODE OF "ASK NARUTO"! The show, where you can ask your favorite character, Uchiha Naruto, absolutely anything!**

**Audience: CHEERS**

**Rinoti: Thank you, thank you! And without further ado, please welcome...UCHIHAAAA..NAAAARUTO!**

**Audience: CLAP CLAP CLAP.**

**Rinoti: So Naruto, what do you think about our little show?**

**Naruto: *raises his eyebrow* I think it's useless.**

**Rinoti: W-what? Why?**

**Naruto: Because you don't have any questions to ask, idiot.**

**Rinoti: What? Don't be silly, of course I do...*starts shuffling through his papers*...Shiiiit, we really don't have any questions...hehe...well, I guess we'll have to cut this episode short. So please – Hey, where the hell are you going, Naruto?**

**Naruto: I'm leaving. **

**Rinoti: You can't just leave, show's not over yet.**

**Naruto: I just did, so deal with it. *walks away* **

**Rinoti: Dammit...Anyway, as I was saying, please your interesting and creative questions for Naruto, and he will answer them right here in this show, in the next episode. Don't be shy or anything, you can ask **_**anything**_** you want. For example - Dear Naruto, how long is your dick?**

**Naruto: *yells from outside* Ask your mom!**

**Rinoti: Fuck you!**

**Naruto: That's what you mom did last night!**

**Rinoti: Grrr...dammit! I hate that guy, why must he always be such a dick, can't he be nice for a change? *Sigh*** **Guess I really will have to deal with it. Oh well. *Turns to the audience* And this is the end of the very first episode of "Ask Naruto". I will see you guys later, in the second episode of our new show, and 'till then...keep on trollin'"**

**RWJ: That's copyrighted, bitch!**

**Rinoti: Shit, gotta run, bye! **


	7. Random shit

YO!

**What's up everybody? Did you miss me? I missed ya too!**

**Sadly, this is NOT a new chapter, so bear with me ok? But don't go all polar on me! (You see what I did there? "Bear" and "Polar"? Polar bear...eeeh, screw you too then. So what if I have a shitty jokes? I still try, don't I?**

**Anyway!**

**The reason that i'm posting this, is to inform you that new chapter won't be comin' out for a...week or two. So stop asking me when i'm gonna update the story.**

**And the reason for a delay? I'm an asshole, that's the reason.**

**No(hopefully), the real reason is that I started watching One Piece, and i'm not gonna write shit until I finish it. But don't worry, i'm already on episode 360 or something, so i'm gonna finish it soon enough. **

**Oh and on a side note, i'm not sure if I expressed myself correctly, and some of you thought that I meant something or that kind of stuff, so i'm gonna clear it up. **

**This new thing that I wrote, "Ask Naruto" is actually one of my new experiments, where _you_ send a question my way via Review or PM, and Naruto answers them. Some of you actually sent some interesting questions(good job on that.)**

**And I repeat myself, you can ask _anything_ you want. For example:**

"**Dear Naruto, what color is your underwear, and did you ever wear thongs?" **

**See? You can either ask this kind of random shit, or something regarding the story. And remember, it's not me who will be answering, it's _Naruto_.**

**And with that said, have a good day and god bless you...**

**…...  
>…...<strong>

…**..**

…**...**

…**..**

**You actually thought I would write shit like that? Fuck no!**

**Now...peace out, bitches! **

**P.S: Are you excited to see "Road to Ninja"? Is fucking awesome or what? It motherfucking is! Especially Menma!**

**P.S2: For those of you who follows Naruto manga: Whoever thought Madara would disappear is a goddamned pansy! He is the most fucking awesome character in Naruto world, bitch!**

**5 Kages? Just let them fuck themselves with a giant meteorite! **

**Fights 5 Kages at once, calls this fight unfair. Some redheaded chick tells him not to call them cowards, and says that they acknowledged his strength. Creates 25 Mokuton Bunshin, 5 for for each Kage, and tells them not to call him a coward. **

**Edo Tensei canceled? Well, fuck you too, now I have indestructible body, and limitless amount of chakra!**

**And finally the most random shit!**

**For girls who read this story(If any):**

**Please do not blame me if I can't describe clothes correctly, or in better details. I don't know how all that shit is called. For example, when I read somewhere "Girl wears spaghetti strap dress", I image a chick in a dress made from spaghetti. I'm seriously not an expert in that field, and all I know of how clothes are called are: jacket, shit, pants, sweater, coat and hoodie. **

**Well, that's all for today, don't forget to join us next week, when we...**

**Shit! Wrong show!**

**Erm...yeah...KTNXBYE! **


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